Finding Our Feet
by AbstractSong101
Summary: Carlisle moves across an ocean, and finds a boy who makes him feel more at home than he ever has. Edward is discovering what he wants from life, and finds a man who will help him live it. AH. CarlWard slash. M for Lang/Lemons
1. Chapter 1

_**AN: Welcome to my story!**  
_

_**It's fully outlined and, baring any major changes, should be 10 chapters long. I have some chapters pre-written so I am hoping to update once a week.**_

_**I hope you enjoy it!  
**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. If i did, Carlisle would feature much more prominently.  
**_

* * *

_"You need to wait outside, Dr Cullen."_

_I huff and walk back out to my family._

_"They have security cameras outside and along the main road, I thought I could wait in there and see him arrive. They wouldn't let me."_

_Emmett laughs, "No shit, really?"_

_"It was worth a try Em. I just need to know where he is."_

* * *

I remember the first time I saw you. I had just moved across the pond from England, keen for a new challenge in my career, fed up of the life of a junior doctor in the UK.

I was trying to get my bearings in my new city, when a music shop announced itself with the sound of a beautiful piano piece flowing out through the door. Inside I found a haven of music. Wandering through the first floor, rows of vinyl and CDs passed me by, almost unnoticed, until the source of the music was revealed to be coming from up a flight of stairs. I followed the sound up and came across a room filled with musical instruments. Without pausing to look at any of the many guitars around, my choice instrument, I headed towards an area where a crowd of people were gathered.

The song was ending as I joined the back of the crowd, trying to get a glimpse of the person playing so well. A more-than-just-polite round of applause broke out as the last note had finished sounding, and I finally got my first look at you, as you stood up and took a mini-bow, obviously embarrassed by the attention you were receiving. People came up to speak to you, and I felt this pull to do the same. I hung back until the crowd had disappeared, looking over the different guitars to bide my time, without really paying any actual attention to them.

Eventually the last well wisher had moved away from you, and you sat back at the piano, almost exhausted by the praise. I hesitated to interrupt your moment of peace, your fingers poised above the piano keys almost reverentially. And then you looked up. Your eyes locked onto mine, and suddenly I had no choice but to come and speak to you. Your eyes drew me in baby, as they do to this day. At the time I had no idea of what that meant, except that I had to hear your voice, and have you hear mine. I craved contact with you.

I congratulated you on your wonderful playing. You smiled and blushed, so shy and so sweet. Your voice was quiet, almost timid as you asked me if I had seen anything I liked in the shop. I had to do a double take, your words making me start, before I realised you meant the guitars. I didn't know it at the time, but I had found something in that shop that I would come to much more than like.

As we walked over you told me how you worked in the shop part time, and the boss was happy for you to play the piano there, as you rarely got the chance to play on such an expensive instrument. And clearly, you drew in the customers. I spoke about my love for guitars, and how I could lose myself in music for hours, either playing or listening. You looked so happy at my comment,

"I feel that way, too. It's like you can just play out your frustrations or feelings. It's better than shouting, more creative, more rewarding."

"I can't imagine you shouting, you seem so quiet. It must be the piano's influence on you," I teased, bringing out your blush again. I couldn't explain it, but I already loved to see your cheeks turn pink at a comment I made. The physical proof of the effect I have on you is something I love to this day, although these days, I know to look for more than just a blush.

You were quiet after that, only offering words of opinion on the guitars I was looking at. I was worried I had scared you off a little with my teasing, but as I made moves to leave, you touched my arm,

"I work every weekend. I mean... If you want to come and hear me play again? Or want some more advice? Or something."

I was so relieved that I hadn't offended you with my teasing, that my response was probably a little over-enthusiastic,

"Yes! Of course I'll come back and see you, I'd love to!"

The smile on your face told me my response was welcome, though, and that's all that mattered to me.

~-FOF-~

Over the next weeks and months, whenever I had a weekend off work, I would come in and see you. Some days you were playing piano, always something new, and others you were swamped with customers. Every time though, I made sure I caught your eye. You would give me a shy smile, and I would browse the shop, hoping to add to my music collection, or trying out the guitars. And, of course, waiting for you to have a free moment. You were so in demand. Such a shy boy, but so well liked. And I was rapidly becoming president of your fan club. You were young, still in high school, and I was 26, nearly 10 years older than you. But I craved your company. You weren't a big talker, unless we were talking about a subject you were passionate about, but something about you calmed me. Something about you drew me in. And I was fairly sure you liked my company, too. The genuine smile that appeared on my face when you saw me, the times you would use your break in work simply to speak to me. The simple things. You made me feel at home in a foreign country.

I still trod carefully, though. I was gay and more than secure in my sexuality, and I had no idea of your orientation. You had never mentioned a girl or boyfriend. And you were still 17. Our friendship was becoming precious to me, and I didn't want to lose it by pushing any boundaries, making you feel I wanted something more from you, something that you didn't want to give. I was content to just be friends; I always would have been content to be friends, as long as it meant you were in my life.

~-FOF-~

I was on call that weekend, Friday night – Sunday morning. Weekends are never ideal times to be involved in emergency medicine. Don't get me wrong, I love the adrenaline rush of a big trauma call, it was the reason this was my chosen specialty. However, I wasn't so much a fan of dealing with people who fail to understand where their alcohol limit is... and weekends brought out that in a lot of people. But, you have to take the rough with the smooth. I ended up stuck at the hospital for a little longer than my shift on Sunday morning, I wanted to see one of my patients settled into their room upstairs, and personally pass on their case to the surgeon taking over their care.

I passed the music store on the way back to my apartment, it was late enough for it to have opened, so I decided to go in and say hello to you. Fortunately the store was quiet and I got to see you straight away.

"I can't stay long; I didn't get much sleep last night."

I couldn't figure out the reason for the look on your face, but you didn't look happy. And you didn't offer up any more conversation, so I decided to fill the silence,

"I had a big call at work. There was a crash on the interstate and the casualties were brought to us. It was crazy, we were working for hours, pretty much non-stop. But everyone so far is doing ok, and that's the main thing. I must have got about a half hour of sleep. So I'm pretty much running on caffeine and adrenaline, in case I seem a little off to you... Or I can't stop talking... Kind of like now actually... Feel free to jump in at any point..."

"Maybe we could grab some food together?"

You asked so shyly, so uncertain of my response. I thought about gently teasing you, about having to think about my answer. But I couldn't bring myself to do it, the hopeful look on your face shattered my wicked instinct, and I could only reply in one way.

"Of course. Are you free tonight?"


	2. Chapter 2

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**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. If I did, there would be a Carlisle and Edward focussed prequel**

* * *

_I pick a chair at the end of a row up against a wall. Slumping down, I rest my head in my hands and sigh._

_"Hey, don't mess up your hair." Rosalie grips my wrist and moves my hands away before they can do any more damage. I look up to see her sitting beside me, a look of exasperation on her face. "You want to be presentable for the photos later."_

* * *

It had been a week from hell in work. A strain of flu had reached the country the week before, a nasty one, and people who were affected badly had to be hospitalised to try and save their lives. Unfortunately we couldn't save everyone. And there seemed to be no end in sight. Of course the media buzz and widespread panic it caused led to people coming in who had a mild cold, who were worried they were the latest casualty of the epidemic. All in all, it was pandemonium.

Triage nurses tried to ensure that only the truly sick patients made it through to us, but more than a few patients knew the right things to say to get to see a physician and did everything they could to ensure they said them, which added to the tiredness and stress we were suffering from.

I had been called back into work on Sunday night, less than 12 hours after I had left and stayed there all week, catching naps in the on-call room when possible. Working regulation laws were ignored, as all doctors and nurses worked around the clock to try and get a handle on the madness. But it seemed futile. As every day went past, more people were affected, more people died.

I was lucky I had memories of our meal out the weekend before to keep me remotely sane when I had some down time.

Our meal wasn't so much a meal but a snack really. We went for a coffee, and you grabbed a pastry while I had a quick sandwich, not sure when I would get the chance to eat at the hospital. I hadn't had much sleep, but that didn't matter to me.

~-FOF-~

Sat in a quiet booth tucked away in the corner, we talked about anything and everything. You told me about school, and how your college applications were going. You told me you were nervous to tell your mother you didn't want to study to become a lawyer and follow in your father's footsteps, your father having died a few years ago. You were considering going that route anyway, just to keep the peace. I empathised, telling you that my father had been the person to push me becoming a doctor. I pointed out that I was lucky, however, to discover in my teens that I enjoyed the challenges that medicine would bring to me, and was happy to choose that career path.

"So you're saying I should keep quiet?"

"No, I'm saying you should find what you want to do. Find what makes you excited to go to college, what you get out of bed in the mornings for. You don't have to find it right away."

We talked around the issue some more. You were so nervous; you saw life ahead of you as something scary, a daunting prospect that needed taming with a plan. I pointed out you didn't have to declare a major any time soon, and in that way, the U.S. system was much less restrictive than in the U.K.. I wanted so badly to reach out and take your hand, maybe hug you. You looked so lost, and all I could think of was the comfort you so obviously needed, but I was too chicken-shit to do anything about it.

The conversation came round to talking about you and your music. I told you how your playing had drawn me in on that first day. You blushed. I may have told you that story just to elicit that response. That's a game I play to this day, although these days you are a lot less shy around me, baby.

And then the conversation turned to me. You already knew the basics, my accent gave away the most obvious thing about me, and my job impacted on my daily schedule so much that you knew about that too.

"What was it like for you, growing up?"

I explained about my childhood, it was a generally happy one with a loving family,

"My younger brother Emmett was a pain, of course, as all younger brothers seem to be. But he has _mainly_ grown out of it now, and we're good friends. Sometimes, I even miss him a little bit," I grin.

I told you about school and the trouble my friends and I would get into for playing pranks. I was a hard worker, though, and left school with good grades. University was a time of transition and exploration for me, and I skirted this subject, merely mentioning that I worked hard and played hard. You weren't quite satisfied with that response, though.

"What about gir..." you paused and looked down at the table, suddenly very interested in your half forgotten pastry, "... relationships?"

Your choice of words seemed significant, but I chose not to make a big deal of it. I told you about Garrett, my first and only long-term relationship. We parted on good terms, but living an ocean away from each other meant we lost contact fairly quickly. In truth, I had other things to concentrate on in my new home, possibly including beautiful piano playing boys.

I didn't tell you that bit.

You didn't seem surprised when I revealed I was gay, not that I ever particularly made a secret of the fact, but you didn't quite know how to react. I wasn't sure what to expect from your next statement, but it sure as hell wasn't what came out.

"I think I'm gay... I mean... I know I am, not think. I am... I'm gay."

Your admission made my heart stutter. I was trying so hard to keep from thinking of you in that way, you were 17 for fucks sake, but I couldn't help the way I reacted to that news, the hope that blossomed in my chest, for the future.

I reached over the table and held your hand. Promised if you ever needed to talk about anything I would be there. You didn't pull away, for someone who wasn't sure of their sexual orientation you were remarkably comfortable to hold hands with a man in a public place. Maybe, looking back, you were just comfortable to hold hands with _me_ in a public place.

~-FOF-~

Our time together couldn't last forever, much as I wanted to stay there and talk all night, and I hadn't seen you since that afternoon. It wasn't unusual, we had only ever seen each other on weekends, but it felt like something had shifted after our meeting outside of work. I had given you my cell phone number, in case you had wanted to get in touch with me, but I hadn't heard from you. I didn't really expect to, you were so shy sometimes I knew you would have trouble even composing a text to me, in spite of how comfortable you were with me.

I missed you. It was now Saturday and it felt like I was hard-wired into seeing you on weekends. I finally was able to go home for some proper rest, but I couldn't resist going into the store on the way home. Your boss said you had called in during the week and taken the weekend off.

I was kicking myself for not taking your cell phone number from you when we last met. I couldn't think of a reason you wouldn't be in, unless you didn't want to see me. As soon as the thought entered my head, my thoughts ran away with me. Maybe I had scared you by taking your hand the week before. There was nothing in it on my side except wanting to comfort a friend, but maybe you didn't see it like that.

Knowing it was a futile exercise, I asked your boss if he could pass on your number, but he refused. I wasn't surprised but I had to try.

The walk home passed in a daze, a combination of the mania of the week in work, too much caffeine, too little sleep, and too much thinking about what I could do to get in touch with you.

Once I was home, I finally fell into a fitful sleep, after a long hot shower to try and make up for the rushed ones I had taken at the hospital. I woke about 4 hours later from a nightmare. I definitely needed to cut back on the caffeine intake.

Some proper food and good sleep later, I was back in the thick of it at the hospital. Nothing had slowed down in the hours I was gone, if anything, the amount of people coming through the doors had increased. I was refreshed though, and happy to jump back into work, which helped to take my mind off you and why you would be avoiding me.

Several patients came though to my care, most were fit enough to go home, having come in unnecessarily worrying thanks to the media storm. I had to send a few up to stay in for observation, but I was pretty confident they would be fine with some hospital care. Before I knew it, 6 hours had passed. Walking past the main desk, I informed the nurses I was going for a quick break. The walk down to the cafeteria gave me an opportunity to let my mind wander to what I could do to reach out to you. If you had backed away because you were unsure of my motives, then I needed to tread carefully to reassure you. I found myself rehearsing a speech to you in my head, while I drank the poor excuse for coffee they served here.

I was harshly pulled from my thoughts by my pager going off. Someone was coding in the ER. I left my half drunk coffee and ran down towards the department, knowing that every second counted. There were other doctors in the ER, obviously, but I had to be there to offer my help. I crashed through into the department and found the room where the patient was. A middle aged woman, surrounded by doctors working over her. And no output. There were enough people there, so I left to give her some dignity.

A nurse handed me a chart, "Dr Cullen, can you look at this guy. I have triaged him, but I can't figure it out."

The patient was complicated, a man who was displaying a few symptoms of the flu, and a few extra on top. No one was sure whether he had flu or another problem and in the end it was decided he should be roomed upstairs for observation. At least if anything went wrong, he would be in the right place.

As I walked back down from handing him over upstairs, I saw a figure huddled on the floor outside the room where the code had taken place. A chill went down my spine as I got closer to him, I could hear and see the sobs shuddering out of his body. And then he looked up. And as your green eyes met mine, full of tears and pain, I knew why you hadn't been in work. You had been looking after your mother. Your mother who had just died.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you for the alerts/favourites/reviews.  
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**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. If I did, I would have made PF and RP do press together at Comic Con.  
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* * *

_I pull at my tie, feeling constricted by it. I wear scrubs when I'm working in the hospital and so Im not used to suits. Being dressed up feels unnatural. At least I'm not the only one. I look around the room, at everyone else in their smartest clothes. My mum in her hat that she was so excited to buy, bless her._

_Rose is still sitting by me, once again grabbing my hands and stopping me from messing myself up too much._

_I'm frustrated and pull my hands away from hers. _

_"There won't be any photos if he doesn't show up, Rose. What's the point?"_

* * *

I held you for what felt like hours in that corridor. You were inconsolable, not speaking a word until one of the nurses told us someone was waiting to meet you in one of the offices. I walked round with you, intending to leave you to your meeting and wait outside for you, but you clung to my hand, and I couldn't refuse you.

The meeting changed everything. It was a worker from DCFS, informing you that you would have to be taken into foster care, due to the fact you were under 18. As if you hadn't had enough upheaval in the last few hours, she informed you that the nearest placement for someone of your age at such short notice was over 100 miles away. You would have to change schools, and leave your job and house behind.

I felt like my chest was being crushed. Not only were you distraught with grief, something I couldn't make better, you were now being moved away from me, away from any support I could give you. I was a doctor, trained to deal with these situations, and yet I didn't know what to say, or do. I felt useless.

All I could do was sit and keep you in my arms for as long as I could. Try to stop you from completely falling apart by holding you together.

My hands were in your hair, your arms were wrapped around my waist as you rested your head against my shoulder, still shaking from crying, emotionally exhausted. A fleeting kiss to the top of your head seemed little comfort to either of us, but it was all I had left. I could do nothing more as you prepared to leave to go home to gather some belongings, before your journey to your new foster home.

A fleeting kiss and a promise to stay in touch. It was all we had.

~-FOF-~

I beat myself up for months that I didn't offer for you to stay with me. But I just couldn't. I knew I felt more for you than you did for me, and I couldn't risk taking advantage of your vulnerable state.

We kept in touch via any means we could. I made sure to take your cell phone number before you left, and an email address too. Most days I would receive at least one text from you, and they never failed to brighten up my day. Even if you were sad, knowing you were reaching out to me and not bottling it up meant so much. I called you on more than one occasion, just offering you someone who had the time to listen to you. Not that you said much sometimes, but I always had a text message the next day saying thank you, and that you were feeling better after our call.

You had been away for 4 months, and were turning 18 in a few weeks. Your foster carers were nice people, but you were looking to move back to the city as soon as you could. I had been keeping busy between the hospital - the flu epidemic was under control after a month or so, but the repercussions lasted a lot longer - and trying to keep up some semblance of a social life outside of the ER department.

I even had a date with a nurse from paediatrics I had seen a few times around the hospital. A few beers at a local bar and 2 hours of sparse conversation later, I realised there was no spark there though. No overwhelming urge to be around him. He had a few reservations, too,

"It's like you're holding something back, like you're waiting for me to do or say the right thing, and I have no idea what that is."

He wasn't annoyed, just observant I guess. More observant than me, anyway, as I had no idea what he meant. Of course, looking back it's obvious. I was waiting for him to be _you_, baby.

~-FOF-~

I had taken a weekend off work and you came to the city for it to look at apartments with me. Your family house had sold quickly; you didn't want to go back there, and you were going to use that money towards an apartment. You were staying at my place for the weekend, and I had spent all week going from chastising myself for being nervous to have you here, to fuelling the nerves by tidying and re-tidying every room.

My nerves disappeared as I opened the door to you early on Saturday morning. I couldn't help myself but to pull you into my arms and hug you. Your bags forgotten, you wrapped your arms around me, too and we must have stayed there for a good 5 minutes. It was so good to see you again, baby, I didn't want to let you go.

We spent our day looking for somewhere for you to live. You had done extensive research online, so we found what you decided was the perfect place for you, fairly quickly. We met the landlord and paid a deposit so you could move in as soon as you turned 18. The rest of our day was free to wander the city. We had only ever been out for coffee that one time, and the rest of our time together had been spent in the music store, interrupted by customers and obligations. So you showed me round some of your favourite places, from a beautiful park to a tiny hole in the wall pizza place that you insisted did the best pizza you had ever tasted. On that recommendation, I had to buy us some. And you were right, it was pretty damn good pizza.

We headed to the music store. You were nervous to go in and see all your work colleagues, but I knew they would be glad to see you. I had been in on a few occasions since you had been gone, and they always asked about you. Your boss, Jasper, had told me that your job was open to come back to, so I encouraged you to go and speak to him. I hung back, browsing some of the CDs, but not really looking at them. My eyes were on you, and the smile that lit up your face when you found out you still had a job there. You had been so worried, choosing to defer college for a year while you get your life sorted out and decided what route you wanted to take, and this news made that decision so much easier for you.

As we left the store, you declared that we needed to celebrate so we picked up some nice food to takeout from a Chinese restaurant, and I picked us up a bottle of wine. You were still 17, but coming from England where drinking was legal at 18, I didn't see the harm in you having one glass.

Slumped on my couch, full of food and sipping our glasses of wine, we relaxed in front of a DVD. I wasn't really watching, though. My eyes were on you, how the wine had given you a pink tinge to your cheeks, how your green eyes seemed to sparkle, how handsome you were. I shook my head to clear it, and decided to stick to water for the rest of the night. I didn't want to scare you off by announcing anything to you while you were stuck at my apartment.

Eventually we both headed to bed, I showed you where the guest bedroom and main bathroom was, and let you know where I would be if you needed anything. Part of me was hoping you would need something, while the rational part of me knew if you woke me up, I wouldn't be sure I could keep my hands to myself. The middle of night didn't tend to bring much rationality.

As it was, I woke up to the sound of you in the shower. I lay in bed until I heard the water shut off and then hopped into my en suite to quickly shower. My cock was begging for attention, as it normally is in the morning. I knew I had to do something about it, so I soaped my hand up and stroked myself. I knew I didn't have long, and I tried not to think of you, I promise I did, but as I got closer to the edge, the image of you on your knees in front of me popped into my head and did me in. You love that story these days, baby. You love hearing how I wanted you from so early on, how I couldn't help but think of you, how the thought of you made me come like a freight train. At the time, though, I felt awful. I had tried so hard to keep you out of those kind of thoughts. But the day spent with you had pushed me over the edge.

The Sunday was spent with me trying not to remember the image of you on your knees while we went down to the waterfront and talked.

"I'm not sure I want to go to college at all. Like, ever."

Your confession came out of the blue. But I stayed quiet, letting you talk it out, you didn't need me telling you what to do, you needed someone to listen to you.

"I just... Jasper said that he wants to open a bar too, where people can play live music. And maybe another store. And he said I could play at the bar... and he's going to teach me more about management... so I can help out with that. I don't think college is for me."

You were so hesitant, and I wondered what you were holding back. I scooted along the bench to get closer to you, and rested my hand over yours.

"I'm scared... I'm scared that my mom and dad can see me from wherever they are and are disappointed in me. What if this is going against everything they wanted for me? I feel like my mom dying has made this easy for me and I feel so fucking guilty, Carlisle..."

I could do nothing but put my arm around you and let you get it out. Reassuring you that your parents would be proud of you no matter what you did.

"I mean, I know I'm not anywhere near as important as your parents are, Edward, but I'm proud of you for this. For standing up and making a decision that is right for you. That's not always easy."

That garnered a smile from you, and as we stood up to walk back to my car, you hugged me,

"Thank you for that. I needed to hear it, I think."

I could hardly concentrate on your words, the feel of your body pressed against mine was distracting, and I knew without a doubt it would be popping back into my head next time I needed to relieve some tension.

Before I knew it, you had pulled away, and were walking briskly away from me. Now baby, we've talked about this moment, and we both had the same concern. Physical reactions. I was hard as soon as I had taken your hand, inappropriate as it was, and it turns out, you were the same. You were worried that I had felt how hard you were while you were so close to me, and so you had to walk away. I, on the other hand, was worried that you were thinking you were giving me the wrong idea. So many misconceptions, I'm glad we can laugh about it now.

We headed back to my apartment in relative silence. I wanted to cook for you before you left, and had been to the grocery store to pick up some ingredients for a quick meal during the week. I let you have a quick nap while I cooked chicken alfredo. I knew you wouldn't want an alcoholic drink if you were driving, so I grabbed some coke out of the fridge for both of us.

The spectre of you leaving hung over us as we picked at our food, I shouldn't have bothered cooking really, but part of me was desperate to impress.

"Have you made any plans for your 18th birthday?"

I knew you were keen to move back to the city as soon as possible, and I will admit I was fishing for information.

"Just moving here, now that the apartment is sorted I want to get back and start at work as soon as I can. I will be done with my finals by then; I only have one left to take now anyway," you shrugged.

"So will you be here on your birthday?" I asked, a plan forming already.

"Yeah I guess I will. No reason to stay away. I'll probably spend the day sorting my apartment out. I don't think I will want to do much celebrating this year anyway."

You were so quiet, I decided to let you in a little straight away, "I'll take the day off and help you move. Maybe we can do something small in the evening? Just to acknowledge it, if nothing else."

You nodded, said you would let me know your plans as soon as you had them in concrete, and with that, it was time for you to leave.

~-FOF-~

Before I knew it, the day had arrived. I was up early to get the keys from your landlord, and waited in to take delivery of some furniture you had ordered.

Not wanting to take over, I just had them taken to the rooms you wanted, figuring we would move them to the positions you wanted later on.

Once you arrived, we went to collect some of your stuff from storage. I knew it would be difficult for you, especially on your birthday, to see the belongings from the house you shared with your parents, but it had to be done, and I was glad I could be there to support you. As it was, you coped admirably, although admittedly you only took the bare minimum out of storage.

We made sure that the picture of you with both your parents was on display at the apartment, so that they weren't shut away entirely, despite your reservations about how they would feel about your life.

It was June, and so hot. After a cold drink we decided to get on with the furniture moving, as not much could be unpacked until we did. Well, after moving the sofa, and building numerous bookcases, we were both hot and sticky. You stripped off your shirt, with a shy blush,

"It's too hot, and we've got two beds to build yet. I know you're a doctor but I don't want you to have to treat me on your day off for heat exhaustion," you grin as you turn towards the master bedroom. "Come on, you can take yours off too, if you need to. I'm not medically trained so you'd be spending your vacation day in your workplace."

I was stunned, both by the words and by the sight of your torso. You didn't have a big build, and I would be a liar if I said I hadn't thought about what was underneath your clothes, but I didn't expect you to be so... toned. With another image burned onto my brain for when I required it - which would no doubt be as soon as I got home - I decided that if you could do it, I would bite the bullet and strip to the waist, too. I mean, it really was a hot day. I grabbed us a couple of cokes from the fridge, pulled my t-shirt over my head and followed you into the bedroom.

We worked all afternoon, putting the beds up took the bulk of our time, although I was definitely distracted doing it, and I was hoping you were too. Before I knew it, I was leaving to rush home and get ready for our celebration.

I intended to just have a quick shower and get changed before heading back out to pick you up. But, as was often the case, my cock had other ideas. You had been teasing me all afternoon, seeing you doing manual work with no shirt on had pushed my restraint to the limit and there was no denying the reaction you caused in me. So once again, I had to lather up and take care of myself. This time, the images of you, half naked, and leaning across your bed were more than enough to fill my thoughts.

I imagined lying beneath you, as you stretched over me, reaching for something. I would grab hold of your hips and bring your toned chest to my own. Even through our jeans, I would be able to feel how hard you were for me, how you wanted me as much as I wanted you. Your hand would sneak down and undo my zipper, and wrap around my cock...

"Fuck..." I groaned, as even the beginning of my fantasy brought me over the edge.

Once I had cleaned up, again, I threw on a decent shirt and a pair of slacks, before going out to pick you up. I had made us reservations at a local Italian I was keen to try with you. It seemed a nice restaurant, but casual enough that you wouldn't feel like I had tricked you into a date.

The meal was delicious, adn as we ate, we talked about your plans for your apartment. You saw it as just a place to live, but I was keen for you to have somewhere that really felt like home. I knew how important that was for me when I moved over, to feel completely comfortable in the place I lived in. And with the upheaval you had faced in the last few months, you needed somewhere stable and comforting to go home to at night.

I managed to get the servers to sing Happy Birthday to you, which had the duel effect of lightening the mood completely, and once again bringing out your gorgeous blush. I think you secretly enjoyed the effort though, and I'm sure you appreciated my gift for you. I had found a journal full of quality sheet music paper, as well as a few books of not-so-good quality paper to compose on, the intention being that you can write the finished product in your journal.

"This is amazing, thank you Carlisle! I don't ever really get the chance to write the music down."

I nodded, "I thought with you working at Jasper's store more, you might have more time to sit at the piano there and compose when it's quiet. But you'll probably get interrupted a lot, so I thought being able to write stuff down might help."

"I've never... I mean, I don't know... I mean thanks. It's awesome, I love it," you rambled. The smile that graced your face made you even more beautiful, and I knew in that moment I was done in by you.

I had to make you mine.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Thank you for the alerts/favourites/reviews.  
**_

**_This chapter is probably the right time for a little reminder that this fic is rated M._  
**

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. If I did, there would be far more Cullen time.**  
_

* * *

_"I'm going to get a coffee. Someone call me if I'm needed."_

_I grab a coffee from a machine and wander outside. My dark mood is in stark contrast to everyone else wandering in and out of the building. I get some funny looks, but I don't care. They don't know what I'm feeling, what it's like._

_Where are you, baby?_

* * *

Over the next weeks and months we fell into something of a routine.

I had been at the hospital for a year, and my hours were slightly more regular and slightly less unsociable, while your hours at the store were fairly regular, except for covering other people's shifts.

On days I worked but you didn't, I would come to your apartment after work and you would cook for me. I had persuaded you to learn to cook, worried about your diet of takeout food. You said you would learn as long as I was willing to be your guinea pig, which, of course, I was. I will admit it took you a while to get the hang of it, but soon you were cooking simple meals like a pro.

On days I was off, I would cook for you. Sometimes I would try and impress you with the food, other times I would cook something simple that you could watch, and try and make yourself. Either way we would usually end up on my couch, watching whatever movie they were showing on TV.

Occasionally our schedules wouldn't line up, and if we wouldn't get a chance to do our usual evening meal in the week, we would try to at least grab a takeout one night and eat at one of our apartments.

This didn't always happen, of course. You sometimes had plans with people from work; you and Jasper were becoming good friends as he took you under his wing at the store. Before the summer came to a close, you would meet people from high school who were keen to hang out before they all headed off to college in the fall. And if anyone came back for a weekend visit you were always happy to catch up with them. I have to admit I was a little jealous, knowing you were out having fun with other people, especially if you had to beg off from one of our regular nights to go out with someone else. But I knew it was good for you to be out with others, and making sure you had enough support from various people. The rational side of me knew I wouldn't want you solely relying on me.

That's not to say that it didn't bring a smile to my face if I received a text from you at the end of the night, even if it was just to say hi, or even – my personal favourite – that you missed me.

Overall, it was a good balance we had, and I felt us becoming closer. You were opening up to me about what you wanted from life, and I was happy to strengthen the connection between us, in any way I could.

~-FOF-~

It was early November, and a rainy, cold, dark night as I bustled through your door. It had been a long day at the hospital; I had started in the very early hours of the morning, having been called in, and been there until well past my usual finish time, a shift of 20 hours straight on the ER floor, thanks to a few big traffic accidents.

"Whatever you are cooking, it smells amazing!" I said, as I walked through into the kitchen. Your cooking had come on so much in just a few months, considering you were the boy who used to be content to live on takeout food.

"Thanks, it's a pot roast, it should be done soon, but I've put a towel out for you if you want to have a shower to warm up. The weather is terrible tonight."

I hadn't thought of that, and as soon as you mentioned it, a hot shower followed by a hot meal sounded like the best plan in the world.

"I think I will, that's a great idea, thanks," I smiled

"Use the en suite bathroom, the shower is better in there. Oh and feel free to use my shower stuff. And if you leave your clothes in my bedroom I'll get them and throw them in the dryer. I've left some clothes out for you, they might be a little small, but they should do." And with that, you turned back to the cooking, oblivious to my slightly stunned expression.

Once in the shower, I tried to ignore my cock, who was very aware of the fact that I had been past your bed, undressed in your bedroom and was now in your shower, using your shower gel. My senses were so tuned into the fact of where I was, that it made it difficult to simply shower.

However, I managed, and willed my cock down with the promise of later as I dried off. You were a couple sizes smaller than me, but had picked out some of your bigger clothes, and although snug, they fit me well enough.

A delicious hot meal finished the job in warming me up, and with heavy stomachs we lazed on your couch. You were flipping through the channels, not really stopping on any, and I wondered what had you so keyed up. I was too full and comfortable to really care though, and before I knew it your hand was on my shoulder, shaking me awake,

"Hey, Carlisle. That can't be good for your back, sleeping like that."

I looked up at you through sleep-blurred eyes,

"Sorry... I didn't mean to fall asleep. I guess your food was just so good I'm in a food coma," I smiled.

You gave me a half smile back, but your face was etched with anxiety. I opened my mouth to ask if you were ok, but you got in there first.

"You can stay here... If you want. You don't have to. But you look exhausted and I don't want you driving like that... I would worry. But I can always make you a coffee if you want to go home. I guess it depends when you're in work tomorrow, yeah?"

I cut off your rambling, unwilling to let you talk yourself out of the offer you were making.

"If you don't mind, I am shattered, and I don't fancy driving home. I'm off tomorrow, so it wouldn't be a problem. Are you working?"

"No, I worked today to cover Jasper so I have tomorrow off instead." You were still looking uneasy and I couldn't figure out why. I was too tired to employ any filter, so I just asked outright,

"Are you ok? I don't have to stay, I can grab a coffee and get going, don't worry," I reassured you.

"No, it's not that... it's just... the guest room is full of stuff. Like _full _of stuff. I've been getting some of my parents things out of storage to sort through, but its taking me ages. It's hard to see everything. We could try and clear the bed, its fine... but if you don't mind, you could always just share with me? You don't have to, don't feel pressured or anything." There were so many emotions going through your voice in that short, disjointed speech. Anxiety, sadness, frustration and... hope?

I pulled you over to me, the sorrow on your face when you brought up how difficult it was to see the possessions from your former life almost demanding that I hug you. I hadn't even known you had been doing that, I knew it was something you were dreading doing. Something that ended up taking nearly a year, thanks to the deluge of emotions it brought to you.

"I don't mind bunking in with you, as long as you don't snore?" I teased.

Relaxing with my words, you giggled a little and informed me that, as far as you knew, you didn't snore. Luckily for you, you were right. I don't cope well with snorers, baby.

We got ready for bed in an almost-awkward silence. I stripped down to my boxer briefs and a t-shirt, while you opted for pajama pants with no shirt.

I let you get into bed first, not knowing if you had a preference for a side, and then I slid under the covers too, hoping to disguise the effect seeing you shirtless had on me. I was definitely regretting the decision to not do something about my persistent erection in the shower earlier. I might have been exhausted, but my cock seemed acutely aware of your proximity.

As soon as my head hit the pillow, however, and I had mumbled a goodnight to you, I was asleep again.

I woke again before I was ready to, my eyes were heavy and it was still dark outside. I couldn't figure out what had woken me, until I heard your whimpers from next to me.

I pulled myself up onto my elbow and looked over at you, blinking to adjust to the low light. Your eyes were shut but you had tears running down your face. I reacted the only way I could think to, by pulling you into my arms and running my hands over your back and through your hair trying to wake you up gently.

As you slowly woke up, you burrowed deeper into my arms as I asked what was wrong.

"I had a dream about my mom dying. I always have nightmares about that day. I hate it," your eyes finally met mine, and even in the dim light I knew they were still full of tears.

"Oh Edward, it's ok, I'm here," I tried to comfort you.

And then you came out with something that completely took me by surprise,

"I know, and you are in my dream too. You save me, Carlisle. I think... I mean I want... Fuck I can't even get my words out." Your breathing picked up, a sign of how annoyed you were getting at your lack of articulation. I pulled you closer and you buried your head in my chest and I heard a mumble, "I think I want to date you. We should maybe go out sometime."

My breathing hitched as I took in your words, and you were so nervous at what you had said, you took my momentary silence as rejection, and tried to pull away from me.

"Forget I said anything, it doesn't matter."

I stopped you rolling completely away and shuffled down the bed a little so that I could look you in the eyes, as much as was possible in the light we had.

"Hey, you just surprised me! That kind of came out of the blue, you know." I reached up to lay my hand over your cheek, feeling the strong softness there, and also some heat, suggesting you were blushing. I tried to ignore my cock's reaction to both that and the conversation, and continued, "Yes I would love to date you. Yes, we should definitely go out sometime, but not tonight, hey?"

You giggled and it sounded like the sweetest sound in the world to me. "Ok, not tonight."

Moving back to a somewhat normal position on the bed, I pulled you against me, unthinkingly, and groaned when your leg brushed up against my, fairly hard, cock. I rushed to apologise, not wanting to scare you into thinking that I wanted something from you tonight. "Sorry, I didn't think. It's you and a bed – what can I say?" It was my turn to blush as you smiled.

"It's ok, Carlisle. You're not the only one...," you trailed off. My mouth opened in surprise as you flipped over with your back to me and pulled my arm over you.

I leant over you to give you a teasing reprimand, but the sight of you there, in my arms overwhelmed me and I just kissed your cheek softly.

"Goodnight sweet boy. We'll talk more in the morning. After I've had some coffee."

"Ok, goodnight Carlisle," your soft voice reached me.

You dropped off to sleep fairly fast, but my head was running through everything that had just happened. I had been wondering in the weeks before how I was going to go about asking you on a date, wondering if maybe we could do something for my birthday, which coincided with Thanksgiving this year. And then you, my shy, lovely boy, just put it out there and asked me. I wasn't sure what came over you that night, baby, I'm still not. You always say you were just so full of need for me it all came pouring it in that moment, but I never know if you're just saying that to get laid. To be fair, it usually works! Whatever it was though baby, I thank whatever god dictates middle of the night conversations daily for your courage. As I lay there thinking about the conversation and the future, I was so giddy I felt like I could run a marathon. The rational part of me took over, however, I really was quite tired, and I held you close, and fell asleep.

I woke to find myself alone in bed, but only had time to panic for a second before the door opened and you came through with a mug of steaming hot coffee for me. You handed it to me, with a slight blush colouring your cheeks.

"This," I gestured to the space between us and grinned, "will definitely work."

Your smile did more wonders for me than the caffeine ever would, not that I would have ever told you that, baby. I do enjoy you bringing me a coffee in bed.

I sat up in bed and sipped at my coffee, blowing on it to help it cool down. You sat on the foot end of the bed and looked at me expectantly.

"Edward, you can't expect me to have a rational conversation with you about dating while we're sat on your bed and you are half naked. Sorry, even I don't have that much will power."

You grinned and stood up, I'm sure you knew exactly the effect you were having on me, and you headed into the bathroom to get showered and dressed.

Once we were both up and dressed, me in my clothes from the day before, we sat down over a breakfast we made together, and decided to go on a date that afternoon, just something simple, a movie and then food after. Nothing hugely pressured.

At home I had a panic about what to wear, and decided on some black jeans and a fitted tee with a sweater over it, the weather was much nicer that day, but it was early November after all, and we would be out into the evening.

The date went so well baby. After a brief awkward few minutes in the car when we were both slightly unsure of how to act around each other, we soon could laugh at ourselves and just enjoyed the time we spent together.

I was so aware that you had been the one to make the moves in this relationship, and I didn't want you feeling like it was all on you, so when we had found our seats in the quiet theater I reached over and held your hand. We moved the armrest before the movie even started, and by halfway through I had my arm around your shoulders and you were leaning against me. Every so often I would press a kiss to your head, and you would reward me with a squeeze of my hand.

The spell was slightly broken as the lights came up, and we walked to the diner we were eating at in relative silence. We had chosen to eat at a diner earlier in the day, because it was informal, and we could sit without feeling like we were on display as 2 guys having a meal together.

We talked about the movie as we ate, I hadn't really been paying attention, a fact you tease me about to this day, but you it has remained one of your favourite films ever since. We watch it so much these days I'm pretty sure I can recite the words along with it. I know_ you_ can!

Neither of us were ready to end the evening, and I was more than happy to walk my burger and fries off, so we drove down to the waterfront and walked along the boardwalk for a while. It was cold, so fairly deserted as we walked along and I took your hand, claiming that we could share some body heat that way. You rolled your eyes at me but didn't object to my theory.

We came across an outcrop of rocks and jumped down from the boardwalk to walk around them. It was the latest in a long line of good decisions we made that day. We found a spot where we were sheltered from the wind, and I pulled you up against me,

"I've had a really good time tonight, Edward, thank you."

You seemed nervous and I wanted you to be totally at ease, so I started rubbing my hands up and down your arms, under the pretense of keeping you warm. It wasn't the smartest idea Id ever had, because although it seemed to relax you, it did nothing but wind me up tighter. We seemed to be on the same wavelength, though, as you pushed your hands under my jacket and held onto my waist. I can almost still feel it to this day, baby, the slight flexing of your fingers, my hands running up and down your biceps, and the rush of feeling that overwhelmed me.

I span you round pushing you against the wall and moved my hands up to the back of your neck,

"Tell me to stop if you want me to, and I will. I promise."

You swallowed nervously and nodded.

The moment seemed to last forever. I can remember every millisecond in detail, inhaling as I brought my face closer to yours, and filling my senses with you. You smelt of the shower gel that had teased me the day before in your shower, and something that was inherently _you_. Whatever it was, it did nothing for my control as I neared your lips. I saw your tongue dart out to lick your lips and mine followed suit. Your eyes fell closed the nearer I got to you and I savoured that moment of complete faith in me. My fingers at the back of your neck played with your hair as I leaned further in, allowing my eyes to fall shut too, happy that you weren't about to stop this, happy that my feelings were returned.

And then my lips touched yours. I feel it every time we kiss baby, I remember how shy and hesitant you were, how you hardly moved for a few seconds as my lips gently teased yours. And then you fell into the kiss. We moved in sync as your hands ran around my waist and up my back, rubbing slowly. My hands were in what would become one of their favourite spots, your hair, just gently playing with it as your lips teased mine.

As you fell away to breathe, I was unwilling to break our connection, and let my kisses trail down your jawline and to your neck, teasing you with my lips and tongue. You groaned and the sound spurred me on as I made my way up to your ear and whispered,

"You want a little more, baby?"

"God, yes," you pleaded.

With a small smile, I moved back to your lips and took advantage of your parted lips to run my tongue over them. You seemed a little taken aback, but once again you got the hang of it quickly and I swear, even then, you were the best kisser I had ever experienced. Now, I can look back and admit that the feelings between us make everything more intense, but at the time, all I knew was I needed more.

We kissed until we were both satisfied, each of us took time to dip down to nibble across a jawline or to tease at a neck. Your hands were everywhere, although they seemed to have found a place resting at the waistline of my jeans, just above my ass. I was simultaneously hoping that you would move them lower, and hoping that you wouldn't move them at all.

As if you knew my turmoil, a couple of fingers brushed down over ass, through my jeans, though, and my reaction was instantaneous. I pressed forward into you, my cock pushing into yours, and you automatically moved backwards,

"Sorry, sorry," I panted. "I just... this is intense."

Your blush lit up your face as you replied "It's ok, I guess we need to talk about that stuff...," you glanced round, "Just not here, is that ok?"

"That's fine baby, honestly. It was just an automatic reaction, I'm sorry if it freaked you out."

We decided to make a move home then, it was getting cold out and I needed some physical distance from you, even if it was just the fact that I had to drive, to try and calm down, otherwise I would be tempted to get you into the back of my car.

Back at your flat, you poured us a drink each and we sat close on the couch.

"So then..." I started, but you looked so nervous I knew I had to start off slowly, "I guess first off I'd better see if you want to go out with me again? Can I have another date?"

You giggled, and I've said it a million times baby, one of the best sounds in the world. "Yeah, I guess you have maybe just about earned another date."

Happy to see you teasing, I couldn't resist stealing another kiss before we continued on with the conversation.

"Where were we?" I smiled as I finally tear myself away from you, a problem we still have these days - excessive kissing.

I knew I had to tread lightly with you to keep you comfortable. I told you about my experiences with men, of which there were only a few, not the tons you seemed to be expecting, and I pulled you into my chest as you admitted that was your first kiss.

"We can go as slow as you want, baby, ok? And if I ever push you further than you want to go, tell me to stop and I will. Just like tonight baby, I promise."

You nodded against me, and ran your hand along my side, letting out a huge yawn. I took that as my cue to leave, even though I really didn't want the day to end. I knew we would have many more like it, though, baby. And I was right.

~-FOF-~

By that Thanksgiving we had settled into something of a routine, which wasn't much different than before, except it involved more making out. I didn't push you for anything more, although I was sure that during some of our heavier make out sessions you must have felt the effect you were having on me.

I was working overnight the night before, and we had agreed that I would stay at your place Thanksgiving night, you argued that I would be too tired to drive home after eating. I wasn't about to argue.

I got to your apartment around 7am and you were still asleep. I kicked off my shoes, scrub pants and shirt and crawled in next to you. I took a moment to appreciate how beautiful you looked, so relaxed and content in sleep. You never let me look at you long, as it makes you feel embarrassed, even to this day, so I still steal those moments when you can't tell me off. Sleep soon overcame me, and I woke a couple hours later to the sounds of the parade. You had the TV on low in the lounge, and I shuffled out to see you. I was still sleepy, and essentially just crawled into your lap and let you run your fingers through my hair as I fell asleep again, but it was so good to enjoy a lazy moment with you, knowing I didn't have to leave any time soon.

When I woke up again, the parade was finishing. You were still letting me use you as a pillow, which I thanked you for, before you stood up, leaned down to kiss my head and went to the kitchen to bring me a coffee.

Told you baby, you're my perfect guy.

Once I had had my caffeine injection and showered, I felt a little more human, and we worked together in the kitchen to make our Thanksgiving meal.

We laugh now, it wasn't the best meal we have ever produced, my sleepiness and you never having cooked anything like that before didn't lend itself to a brilliant meal. But we have got better since, our Thanksgiving meals are now the stuff of legends.

You gave me my birthday present, I hadn't wanted much fuss, knowing I would be tired from work, and knowing the day could be hard for you, your first Thanksgiving without your mom. You had bought me a new docking station for my IPod, claiming, with a cheeky grin, that mine wasn't good enough to play your music through. You had also had a picture of us from one of our trips to the waterfront framed for me. It was a picture I hadn't seen before, and it was beautiful. There was a sunset behind us and we looked so at peace, and content. It was perfect.

That night was the first time we had shared a bed for a night since the night that started it all. There was less awkwardness as we undressed, although I am sure the couple of bottles of beer we had drank throughout the evening contributed to that.

I pulled you close to me as soon as we were under the covers, my hand finding its place in your hair and bringing you to my lips. I felt your body relax as we kissed, and in that moment I decided to push things a little.

Rolling you onto your back, I lay over you and lifted my head up to check you were still ok. Our hips were now firmly pressed against each other, and I could feel your cock through your pajama pants, as I'm sure you could feel mine. Your sparkling green eyes showed me nothing but excitement as I grinned back at you, but I had to check,

"You're not drunk are you? I don't want you to hate me in the morning if we go a little further tonight?"

You rolled your eyes at me, "I had two beers, Carlisle, hours ago. I'm fine. I want a little more." And if I needed any more persuading, your beautiful blush appeared again.

You had left a t-shirt on to sleep in, so I sat back and pulled that off you, moving your hands to the edge of mine and letting you do the same for me. I lay back over you, letting my kisses wander over your neck before moving back up to your lips. You surprised me by taking control of the kiss, sliding your tongue through your lips to meet mine.

All the time our hips were slowly moving against each other. I was moving my hard cock along yours, and fuck if that wasn't the best feeling Id experienced with you then, even with us both covered by our pajama pants. You were moaning softly into our kiss, and you bent your knees to try and give yourself more leverage against me.

"Do you want more, baby?" I wasn't sure whether to push it any further, and truth be told, I knew I would come if we carried on for much longer, anyway.

"I don't... oh fuck... I don't know. This is good. Oh God... This is good, Carlisle. Don't want it to end."

Your answer made up my mind, I wasn't going to overload you that night, and no matter what you said, I wasn't entirely sure your judgement was clear of alcohol anyway. And for sure it was going to end quickly if we got our hands on each other.

Instead, I kissed down your chest, pleased to have the opportunity to explore somewhere I had only felt with my hands before. I took my time, and nibbled along your collarbones while my hands ran over your abs, my tongue teased at your nipples while my fingers played at the slight trail of hair leading under your pajama pants. Every reaction I gained from you, I catalogued and stored for further use, your ticklish spots, what would make you moan, curse, and my favorite, what made you moan _my name_.

You turned out to be quite a talker in bed, which was a pleasant surprise given that you were so quiet in everyday life. I can't deny that it was even more of a turn on to hear this side of you.

My cock was protesting at the lack of friction it had been getting since I started my exploration, and so I moved back up your body and moaned as I felt your erection against mine.

"I'm not going to last much longer, baby. You feel so good," I groaned into your ear.

I felt your cock twitch at my words, and grinned to myself, you liked dirty talk too. Like I said baby, perfect for each other.

"You like hearing what you're doing to me, Edward?" I took your moan as a yes, "Fuck I'm so hard for you right now. Can you feel my cock against yours? That's all your doing, baby."

"Fuck Carlisle..." you panted, "... close."

"Me too baby, me too. I want to feel you come for me," I ground out, my hips moving against yours at an almost frantic pace now, chasing my release, and with the shudder that went through your body, your fingers digging into my back and the moan that came out of your mouth, I found it.

"Oh God, oh God, oh God... Carlisle," your words spurred me on.

I groaned your name into your neck, my orgasm rushing through me.

Lying on top of you, both of us out of breath, covered in cum, I softly kissed my way up from your ear to your lips, thanked you and realised I never, ever, wanted to lose this.


	5. Chapter 5

_**Thank you all for the alerts/favourites/reviews. They make me smile.  
**_

___**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. If I did, I would suggest that Peter and Rob move in together.**_  


* * *

_My feet have taken me down to the main road. Just hoping I can see you. Jasper is bringing you here and I can't even remember what his car looks like._

_I sigh and walk back up to meet my family. I look at them in question when I arrive, but their faces tell me everything I need to know. No changes; you're still not here._

* * *

I spent the first 11 days of February frantically working so that I had the week of Valentine's Day off. I booked us into a cabin in the woods, far enough away from civilization that we could both have a break from people, our jobs meant we spent all our time dealing with other people and so, even now we pick our vacation destinations based on wanting to be alone. We were close enough to the nearest town to have other things to do, though, although I will admit to mainly planning on us spending all our time in the cabin.

You drove there, citing my exhaustion from work as your reason for taking that duty. I had spent the night before packing and getting my apartment ready to be left for a week, not sleeping, and despite wanting to keep you company while you drove, I took the opportunity to nap while I could.

~-FOF-~

The few months preceding the getaway had been good. We tried to spend a couple nights a week together at one of our apartments, and we spent Christmas together, too.

Once again, I was on call both Christmas Eve day and night. We had decided on my apartment for Christmas, as you hosted Thanksgiving, and I had given you a key to let yourself in after work on Christmas Eve.

"You can keep it, come over whenever. Honestly."

The look of surprise on your face had almost made me laugh.

"Baby, seriously. I want you here whenever you want to be here. Hell, snoop round, I don't care. There's nothing here that I don't want to share with you. And the idea of you being here when I get home from work makes me so happy." I needed to lighten the atmosphere, "Especially if you've cooked for me."

With a shy grin, you accepted, and with no fanfare a few days later, handed over a key to your apartment to me, "In case there's an emergency. Or you want to see me. Or stay at my place. Or just come over. Or whatever."

You've never grown out of rambling when you're nervous, and I love it.

Working over Christmas at the hospital was something I enjoyed, I still do. All the staff were in good spirits, although it was harder than usual to see patients come in with serious problems at that time of year. But we all made the best of things, trying to keep up the Christmas cheer as much as possible while we worked.

You came in with Jasper around 5pm on Christmas Eve, with a Starbucks coffee and muffin and a big smile for me. You told me you were heading to Jasper and Alice's house for a while, to watch a Christmas movie, but that you would be at my apartment by about 10pm, ready for whenever I got home. I was happy you weren't going to be alone for the evening, your friendship with Jasper and Alice was so good for you, and I was happy you had such good friends.

I eventually left the hospital just after 3am on Christmas day, fairly confident that the junior staff could handle anything that came in after then and I wouldn't be called back. It was the first time you had stayed at my apartment when I wasn't there, and the sight of you in my bed warmed my heart more than any Christmas cheer at the hospital ever would.

I slipped under the covers, and pulled you into my arms, almost willing you to wake up. Which you did.

"Hey baby, Merry Christmas!" I grinned at you, your confusion clear even in the dim light. As you realised what was going on, you pulled me closer and gave me a quick kiss.

"Happy Christmas, Carlisle. I'm glad you're back, I honestly am. But I'm really tired." You rubbed your eyes, trying to wake up a little.

I laughed, "Go back to sleep baby, it's like 4am. I'll see you in the morning."

You slept longer than me on Christmas morning; I was up early to Skype my family back home before they were all too full of Christmas food to move. We opened presents over the internet, instead of in person. It's never quite the same, but it is a decent substitute.

My mum and dad had sent me a box full of "English" food to eat, which I was so grateful for. And Emmett, my brother, had sent me a couple of our local football team's shirts to, and I quote, "represent" while I was living over here.

I wanted to introduce them to you, I thought I had heard you up and about but you didn't emerge from the bedroom, so I settled for telling them about you instead. They had heard bits and pieces before, but I wanted them to know how special you were to me. They were all happy for me, especially my mum, who burst into tears when she heard that we were spending Christmas together, and then promptly demanded I sent her a picture of us. Emmett found the whole thing hilarious, and teased me mercilessly when he learnt you were only 18. But he was happy for me too, and I finally left them with the promise that they could meet you soon.

Once I was in the kitchen and cooking some breakfast for us, a full English breakfast – we do Thanksgiving with your traditions, Christmas with mine – you came out and started some coffee for yourself. I mentioned my family to you, and told you they were happy we were together. You just nodded and carried on with what you were doing, so I grabbed you, and my phone, and I snapped a photo of us together, still in t-shirts and pajama pants, and sent it off to my mum.

Her reply – "Carlisle, you two are adorable together, tell him I love him already. Will send him a belated Christmas present" – made your face light up.

Our Christmas food all went down well, and by early evening we were on the couch watching a Christmas movie. I tried to keep everything low key for you, not wanting to make anything too major for your first Christmas without your mom, but Elf was on. So we were watching it. I love that movie.

We exchanged gifts, I had bought you a couple of tickets to a gig of a band you liked, as well as a few DVDs you had been after. You gave me a couple of CDs of bands Id mentioned wanting to listen to, as well as an unlabeled CD. When I asked what it was, you shyly admitted that it was some of your music you had recorded and had put on CD for me. I had been saying for weeks I wished I could have your music with me whenever you weren't around, and you had given me that.

I was overwhelmed by the thought that had gone into your gift and pulled you down to lie on top of me, so that my hands would have free access to your body. You lowered your head to mine and I tried to put all the emotion behind the kiss that I had. My hands were trailing up and down your back, and eventually snuck underneath your t-shirt. My legs were wrapped around yours, pressing our cocks against each other, through our jeans, and I groaned and pulled away from you,

"Bedroom?"

A blush coloured your face, and I could see a hint of nerves appearing.

"It's only early," you protested, weakly.

"I know baby, I know, but that just means we have even more time to play before we sleep, yeah?" I looked to you, to make sure that you were happy with things, and you nodded and sat up. I took your hand and pulled you into my bedroom, pushing you back up against the door as I closed it.

I pressed my body up against yours and nibbled at your neck,

"You can stop me, if it goes too far baby. I won't push us all the way tonight, don't worry," I reassured you, worried that I could feel tension in your body. I didn't want the evening to be marred by you worrying that I was going to try something more than you were ready for.

I was pleased I had said that, I felt the slight tension in you dissipate as I kissed you firmly. My hands were at the edge of your t-shirt, and as I pulled away from kissing you to take a breath, I pulled it off you and led you over to sit on the bed. I removed my own top and unbuttoned my jeans and kicked them off. You reached for yours too,

"You don't have to, Edward, if you're not comfortable yet." You still slept in pajama pants, although we had progressed slightly beyond a dry hump recently, you seemed more comfortable at least starting off in pants.

"It's ok, Carlisle. I want this," you said, as you pulled your jeans down your legs and lay back on the bed.

I took a moment to admire you, your pale skin against my dark comforter, your green eyes so full of trust looking back at me, your hair a mess from where my hands have been playing in it, as they always do.

You were and are perfect, baby.

I lay down next to you, rolling you onto your side to face me. Your hands played with the hair at the top of my neck, while mine traced down your side to your boxers, and back again. Everything slowed down a little from the intensity we started with, as our tongues played lazily with each other and we broke away to kiss necks, cheeks and jawlines.

The urgency returned, however, and I shuffled a little closer to you, and rolled you onto your back,

"Trust me?"

"Of course," your eyes showing no hint of reservation.

I kissed my way down your chest, pausing for my tongue to sneak out and tease at your nipples. My hands were moving along your cock, over your boxers, and you were wriggling against my hand and asking for more, so I sat back and pulled your boxers down.

I rubbed my hands up and down your legs, and teased you as much as I could with my mouth, kissing your hipbone, down your thighs and calves and back up again, repeating the cycle over and over. I wanted you to be so desperate for me it was all you could think of; I wanted to give you everything you wanted. I wanted your words.

"Please, please... Carlisle, _Jesus_, please"

I grinned and moved back up to talk in your ear, while my hand moved to your cock and spread around the precum that had gathered around the tip.

"What do you want, beautiful?" I whispered in your ear, "Do you want me to keep touching you like this?"

I slowly moved my hand up and down your cock and you groaned,

"Yes... I mean no... Oh God. More. Please..."

My hand continued to tease, not giving you anywhere near the friction you needed, and my kisses dropped down to your neck, winding you tighter, slowly bringing you higher, before asking another question.

"Do you want me to wrap my lips around you? Do you want me to suck your cock, baby?"

Nothing comprehensible came out of your mouth, but I took what did as confirmation that yes, you did want that. I moved back down your chest quickly, wanting to reward you for your vocal encouragement, pausing briefly to tease your nipples before moving down to take your cock into my mouth.

"Oh my God..." you ground out.

I took that to mean I was doing ok, you seemed to be enjoying it, and before long I was hearing your choppy breath, a sure fire indicator you were close to coming. I kept my efforts steady, I knew this was a first for you and while I wanted it to be good, I didn't want to overwhelm you. I knew that somewhere in your brain you would have been paying attention to my technique for the return favor.

Your body shuddered and I swallowed you down, before kissing my way back up your chest, giving you chance to catch your breath. You tried to say something, but all that came out was a croak, so I went out to grab us both a bottle of water.

When I returned you were fast asleep. I will admit I felt slightly smug that I wore you out that much, and just pulled the comforter up over us both, arranging myself around you, and I was asleep fairly soon after, despite being wound up from what we had just done.

~-FOF-~

I gently teased you about that for a while after, although you were mortified when you woke up that you left me hanging. I wasn't mad, and boy did you return the favor that morning. I was right about you paying attention to what I was doing, and I was more than happy to let you explore your new skills. As I've often told you, you can take your time doing that whenever you want, baby.

We spent New Year together too, watching the ball drop on TV, before having our own private celebration. New Years Day you finally met my family, via skype of course. You were cooking, to give you an excuse to just say hi and chat for a short time before having to go and carry on with what you were doing, but your quiet affection towards me won over my family as much as possible in that short time.

January flew by in a whirlwind of working, although I made time to have an evening where we had a romantic meal, and a walk down on the waterfront again. This time, instead of kissing you for the first time, I kissed you for the something-hundredth and, as I held you and revelled in the contentment of being close to you, realised I was falling in love with you for the first.

~-FOF-~

Our cabin was lovely.

It had a log fire, a spacious kitchen, a hot tub on the deck outside and a bedroom with a fantastically comfortable bed in it.

We had spent the day before Valentine's Day exploring the nearby town – it had a tiny coffee shop that we both loved. Mismatched furniture, shelves full of books to read while you sipped your drink, board games to play, absolute heaven to two city boys. We spent some time talking about your job, and how excited you were for the expansion that was being planned. While no one was in ear shot, you told me that this coffee shop was giving you some ideas to take back to Jasper. I knew we would pay it another visit before we left.

Valentine's Day was a game changer for us.

I had planned out most of the daytime for us, although most was flexible. A hike in the woods, with a picnic at a spot I had seen mentioned on the internet, and then a lazy evening in. It wasn't the 'classic' view of Valentines, for sure, but I knew you would feel uncomfortable with a big deal.

The picnic spot was gorgeous, a clearing in the woods next to a river. Picturesque and serene, I made sure to take some pictures while we were there, both of the landscape and the company I was there with. I lay my head on your chest and held the camera above us and snapped a picture of us both in our relaxed state in a beautiful place. That photo hangs in our bedroom, still. It represents so much to us both.

As we lay there and talked, I knew I had to tell you what I had realised over the last few weeks. I was in love with you. Starting with that night at the waterfront, it was a gradual realisation; there was no moment of clarity, no movie-style halting in the street. It was an acknowledgement that you were one of the most important parts of my life, and I was glad of that. I wanted you with me as much as you could be, I missed you when we weren't together, text messages and phone calls from you lit up both my phone and my day, and my place felt empty when you weren't there.

I pulled myself around so I was lying on my side facing you. Threading my fingers through yours, I took a deep breath, and started to speak.

I have no idea why I was so nervous, looking back all the signs were there that you loved me too. But I was putting my heart on the line, and no matter how much you told me you enjoyed our time together, I knew that necessarily equate to love in your eyes. I was scared that you would be scared by my admission, and I was scared that you would feel pressured into saying it back to me.

I had to tell you though, it had been bursting to come out for the last couple of weeks.

"I'm glad we came away, baby. It's nice to spend some quiet time with you away from everything."

You nodded in agreement, and I pressed on before you could interrupt.

"I like spending time with you anywhere, though. I miss you when you're not around. I feel like we've really got something good here, you know? I'm lucky to have found you, Edward, and I wanted you to know... I'm in love with you."

I knew there was no point talking around it, you would interpret that as me not being sure I wanted to say it.

I looked into your eyes, trying to decipher your reaction. You didn't pull away from me, which allayed most fears I had. Your cheeks reddened and your eyes broke contact with mine as you looked down to our joined hands. Pulling them to your cheek, you leant towards me and kissed me softly, pulling back an inch to whisper "I love you too, Carlisle," and then kissing me again.

I had never felt relief like it, knowing you felt the same, knowing I could say it to you whenever I wanted, never having to hold back again when it threatened to burst past my lips.

We lay there for hours, talking, intermittently kissing and making declarations of love – just because we could.

Back at the cabin, we decided to get in the hot tub to relax our muscles after the hike. Both in our boxers, we jumped in, the February chill still hanging in the air and making us shiver, despite how warm we had got walking. It worked wonders, both of us collapsing on the couch, our limbs like jelly when we climbed out.

We stoked the fire and flicked through the TV channels while lazing on the couch together, both of us clearly more interested in our wandering lips and hands than anything else.

Eventually I couldn't stand it anymore, and I pulled you to the bedroom, unwilling to deal with the complexities of trying anything on a couch, especially when we had a fabulous bed to use.

I was hovering over you on the bed, a moment of relative stillness in the midst of the heavy emotions of the day. As I looked down at you, it felt like something shifted between us. The atmosphere changed, your eyes darkened and we both knew, without speaking that tonight was the night.

I rolled onto my back, pulling you over me so you were completely in control and whispered,

"We don't have to. I didn't say I love you because I wanted this. I mean, I do want this. But I love you, whether we do this tonight or in a few months time."

You nodded, and dipped your head, kissing up my neck until you reached my ear,

"I want this, I promise. I want you. Tonight. Now."

The rush that went through my body at your words made me groan out loud. My hand in your hair, I brought your lips back to mine, and then resumed my exploration of your body. Over your shoulders, and down your arms, I felt your biceps flex slightly as you held yourself over me. My hands ran over your back, to the waistband of your pants, before trailing back up your chest, quickly teasing your nipples to make you squirm, and ending up back in your hair.

Your kisses were tentative, as were your hands, and I made sure we spent plenty of time just kissing and touching, getting you as relaxed and comfortable as possible. We had all the time in the world, and I wanted every moment of it to be as pleasurable as possible for you.

We ended up with you on your back, writhing underneath me as my fingers worked to get you ready. Despite our explorations on other nights, when we had been discovering what you liked and what you didn't, it had been a slow process, plenty of warming up, slowing down, backing off, building it up, working to get you to the point where you were ready for me.

You were nervous and tense. I was nervous and terrified of hurting you. But we both wanted this. Communication wasn't an issue, and it came naturally to work in tandem, I could read your body's reactions to me, and you backed up anything I thought with verbal confirmation.

As I teased you, I spoke to you, whispered all the little things I loved about you, your blush, the way you knew when Id had a bad day at work and did everything you could to make it better, your love for your job and the music you play, the cups of coffee you made me in the morning, the way you always thanked me for the little things I did for you. It was such a relief to be able to tell you everything, baby. I felt like I'd held it in for so long, and telling you had the added bonus of helping you relax.

Slow progress it may have been, but it still felt like mere minutes later when my cock was covered by a condom and lube, hovering over your body, ready to push into you. I looked down into you eyes, searching for anything that hinted you weren't ready. You knew what I was doing, of course.

"I want this, Carlisle, I'm ready. I love you. Please?" Your words came out as a groan as I took a hold of your cock. I leant down, bringing my lips to yours. Your words were confident, but your eyes betrayed the nerves you were experiencing.

"I love you too, baby. I'll go as slow as you need. Talk to me."

It was heaven. Being inside you. Knowing I was the only man to have ever done this with you. Knowing that your heart was all mine, and you had accepted my heart in return.

It was hell. Staying still. I was the only man you had been with, which my possessive side _loved, _however, the reality of being surrounded by your heat, and warmth, and trust, and _love, _made everything more intense than I had ever known.

We moved together slowly, falteringly. To an outsider it may have looked clumsy as we tried to figure out a rhythm, but to us it was completely perfect.

My head was buried in your shoulder as my hips moved, your lips right by my ear providing a soundtrack of moans and encouragement. I whispered broken words of love and adoration to you, overwhelmed by everything I was feeling. Knowing this wouldn't last long. Knowing it had to be good for you.

I took hold of your cock again, wanting this to feel as good as possible for you. Wanting to show you in a physical way how much I loved you, how much you meant to me. We had given our words to each other, and now our bodies.

Our breathing got choppy, getting closer. Or lips met, not kissing and yet not apart, as if we needed every connection we could find as we finally spiralled out of control, your hands holding me close, so close.

Once I had regained feeling in my legs, I moved away from you, grabbing a washcloth to clean us both up.

I leant over you and kissed you, running my hands through your hair, their favorite place,

"Thank you baby, that was amazing. More than amazing."

I could see your blush, even in the dark room,

"It was, don't be shy. I love you, Edward"

"I love you, too Carlisle. So much."

And with the declarations said, we curled up together to sleep. Your body was pressed so close to mine, as if you couldn't be close enough, and I knew exactly how you felt. The need for love and security. The need for closeness, the need to be like this, all the time. The apprehension about going back to our everyday lives, or routines, our jobs and our separate apartments. I knew this was what I wanted, the day had just proved that to me. We were on the same wavelength.

I wasn't sure how I could ever let you go again.


	6. Chapter 6

_**Thank you all for the alerts/favourites/reviews. They brighten up my day.  
**_

___**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. If I did, I would be making sure there was plenty of Carlward action in BD2.**_

* * *

_My mum sits by me and puts her arm around my shoulders. I might be a grown man, but there's nothing like a hug from your mum._

_"He will be here, Carlisle. You know he will. That boy loves the bones of you; he wouldn't miss this for the world."_

_"Then why hasn't he rung someone? What if something has happened to him, mum? I can't lose him."_

* * *

We had spent the rest of our Valentine's holiday mainly in the cabin, exploring the new dynamic to our relationship.

We did get out a few times, we hiked around the area again, and visited the coffee shop we had found, trying out the various cakes and treats they had there. Your ideas for the music store were really coming on, and we spent a good few hours writing down thoughts for you to relay back to Jasper. It was a different vision than his, and I was proud of you for being able to think outside the box, even if you were a little nervous about it,

"What if he thinks I'm trying to take over? He's still only training me up, I don't want him thinking I don't like his ideas."

Jasper's friendship was so important to you, and I was keen to reassure you that Jasper would be pleased that you were thinking of ways to make his business better,

"Baby, I'm sure Jasper will love to hear your thoughts! He doesn't have to implement them if he doesn't want to. You can bring it up casually, you don't have to go into his office, throw all his papers round and insist he changes the way he does everything immediately."

The thought of you doing that brought a smile to your face, and you sipped your hot chocolate before getting back to writing your ideas down. We were curled up on a loveseat, my arm around your shoulders, reading one of the books they had there, but really paying more attention to you. Your face when you were deep in concentration was something I found utterly adorable, and I still have to curb the desire to kiss you. On our few visits there, you had charmed the woman who ran the place, she was consistently bringing you new treats to sample, things she claimed she was working on and needed a guinea pig for. You were completely oblivious to the effect you were having on her, and me.

Unable to resist, I leant down and kissed your head, earning a slight grin from you, before you were back to scribbling down ideas. I went back to reading my book, enjoying the comfortable, relaxed silence.

~-FOF-~

Thoughts of our week away kept us both going through the next few chaotic weeks and months.

I was coming to the end of my second year at the hospital, and was having to schmooze more and more with corporations and companies, as well as higher level staff. It wasn't all bad, and I had made a few good friends among the staff, but it cut into the time that we could be spending together.

You were busy at the store, too. Jasper had found a new building on the other side of the city, and was readying to expand his business.

You had worked so hard on your ideas for the new store, and between us we figured out a way you felt comfortable bringing them up with him.

I was off work the day you chose to talk to him, and I showed up at your work to take you out for lunch, and to see how it went.

Your beaming smile told me everything before you even opened your mouth.

"He loved it! We're going to talk about how we can incorporate my ideas at the new store!"

Jasper was behind the counter, and I shot a look towards him, and he grinned back, obviously pleased with you. You were so happy, and I was so proud of you that I couldn't help but lean down and give you a quick kiss. We were normally quite reserved in public, mainly in deference to your shyness, although as time went on we became more relaxed about touches and kisses. We'd never had any trouble.

Except for that day.

A customer at the store saw our moment of affection, and felt the need to comment on it.

"That's fucking disgusting."

You froze in my arms, your head resting on my shoulder. I could feel the tension in your body; I could feel your need to get away. And I had no idea how to handle it.

I kept a tight hold of you, and turned my head to the man, an eyebrow raised.

"Really? I can't imagine that being completely in love with a beautiful boy is more disgusting than being you."

You were completely still in my arms, and I was praying I was doing the right thing by keeping you close, and not letting you leave and hide from it.

Jasper had overheard the disturbance and was on the move towards the man before I had even opened my mouth. As he reached us, I nudged you to make you watch what happened, knowing Jasper would do whatever he could to protect you. He wasn't a bulky guy, but he had a way about him that made you not want to argue with him. I knew he would sort it out.

He removed the guitar from the man's hands, "You need to leave. Now." And with that, he put the guitar down and, having motioned another store worker to help him, escorted the man out of the door, as I held your shaking body close to mine.

I walked you towards the back of the store and, with a quick glance at Jasper to check it was ok, brought you into his office.

It was the first time you had faced any homophobia, and it had really got to you. Our planned celebratory lunch turned into me holding you while tears spilled from your eyes. The time that we should have spent talking about the future was spent with my reassurances to you that it was just the minority of people who thought that – and they were wrong. So, so wrong.

Jasper gave you the afternoon off, and we spent the rest of the day cuddled on the couch. You were quiet – contemplative – as I cradled you in my arms, hoping that I could somehow protect you from the hurt you were feeling.

In bed that night you were needy, desperate for reassurance that we were ok, that what we were doing was ok. I tried to convey through my touches that you were loved; lying behind you I rested one hand over your heart as I whispered the things I loved about you in your ear. Every kiss I laid on your body was a promise, a declaration that every bit of you was mine, as I was yours. And as I moved inside you it was a reminder that we were right, that we were meant to be together, that as long as we were happy, it didn't matter what anyone else said.

You slept that night curled so close to me, almost afraid to let me go. I slept badly, knowing it wouldn't be the last time we faced something like that, and hoping that it wouldn't break you.

~-FOF-~

The weeks following the incident were a time of reworking our relationship in a way. You were resistant to any public displays of affection, refusing to even talk about it, while I was keen to show you that there was nothing wrong with taking your hand when we were out and about.

It was an almost tense time, difficult to know where to go from there, and even though the time we spent at home was lovely, we ended up throwing ourselves into work to avoid the awkwardness of meeting up in public.

Eventually I was starting to worry about the distance we were putting between us, I was desperate to ensure I didn't lose you over a stupid comment. I arranged a meal for us at my apartment, with no interruptions, where we sat down and talked about it, really talked. Your concerns were obvious, and I was keen to allay your fears. We reached a compromise, where I wouldn't push you every time we were out, but you would start to let a little affection back into our lives.

And that's what we did, and slowly built your confidence. I was so glad we had managed to come to a resolution. Part of me was concerned that your young age was going to be problematic; your refusal to even discuss the issue for weeks had worried me. But I knew that this was all new to you, and I knew that you were wise beyond your years, and I was happy that you repaid my faith in you.

For my part, I learnt that sometimes you just needed time to sort your own feelings out before you discussed things with me. I needed to learn to not push you into doing what I thought was best.

And between us, we learnt a little more about our relationship.

~-FOF-~

One of your ideas for the store was to give music lessons to kids, while the parents could relax in a cafe not unlike the one we visited while we were at the cabin. Once you had some practice at teaching, you could go to college for a music education degree, if you wanted to.

You were an accomplished musician already, but you spent hours practicing. So many evenings I spent with you while you played guitar, or sat with you in the store while you played piano. And then I had an idea.

"Teach me."

The song you were playing stopped abruptly and you looked up at me, half surprised, half amused. "Did I hear that right?"

"Yeah. I mean why not? You can see what it's like to teach someone this stuff, I know I'm not a kid but at least you will have a feel for it. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work. But it could be fun, baby." Yeah, I was thinking about how close we could get while you taught me to play. I was sure I could persuade you to be quite... hands on... in my lessons.

As it turned out, I completely sucked at guitar. You managed to teach me a few basic chords, and I can now strum along with a simple song, but I definitely wasn't the next Jimi Hendrix. It probably didn't help, though, that you could teach me guitar in our apartments, a fact that meant our lessons were often cut short. What can I say, you knew what you were doing as you sat behind me to teach me, guiding my hands. Yeah, it's no wonder I didn't make huge amounts of progress.

I did a lot better at piano. I had some prior experience, although it was from when I was a kid, but after a few lessons with you it all came back to me. And we had to practice at the store. That probably helped, too.

~-FOF-~

Your lease was up in June, and I battled with myself about whether to ask you to move in with me. I decided not to, in the end. We had only been dating for 7 months, and I was keen for you to experience some independence before we lived together. Because I knew once you moved in, I was never going to let you move anywhere without me again.

The year flew past, with the store's restructuring and you throwing yourself into teaching in a back room at the old store, building up a small client base before the move.

Jasper was still keen for you to learn the business side of things at the store, and had decided to make you assistant manager at the new place, and when you weren't teaching, you were learning about your new role and what it would include.

The grand opening was in October, an all day event designed to show off what the store had to offer. You played a few pieces on piano throughout the day, showcasing your talent, and by the end of the day there was a long list of people who were interested in taking lessons with you. I had the day off work and had spent it at the store, helping where needed, but mainly just admiring you. You were so good, quietly confident in your role, talking to people of all ages about the lessons, and watching you with the kids melted my heart. You had drawn me in with your quiet and gentle ways and the kids all seemed to love you, too. I knew how nervous you were about the day, and the store – the store which had a lot of your ideas incorporated into it – and I knew the positive feedback you were receiving would do wonders for your self-esteem.

The successful day was ended by a meal out with Jasper and Alice, all of us on such a high from how the opening had gone.

Your beautiful blush was brought out as Jasper thanked you for all your ideas, telling you how proud he was of you. You had been working at the store since you were 16 and now, 3 years on, Jasper's opinion was one of the most important in your life, and to have him so grateful was a huge boost for you.

We split off from Jasper and Alice, as they were moving on to some clubs, and you were still only 19. We took a quick taxi ride back to my apartment, where we couldn't take our hands off each other. I had spent the whole day admiring you from afar, watching as people complimented you, as they fell in love with you a little, and I was ready to claim you back as my own.

Against every urge in my body, though, I pulled back. I wanted to do something to show you how proud I was of you and everything you had achieved over the past year, and Jasper had helped me come up with the perfect gift. One evening when you were working at the first store, I went to the new place with Jasper, and he recorded me playing piano for you. I was nowhere near as good as you, but I wanted something that demonstrated something that you had given me. I knew that sometimes you felt the age gap between us, and worried that I was giving you more than you could give me back. It wasn't true, but this was a way I could show you that.

I set up my I-pod in the dock and sat back on the couch with you, bringing you into my arms to lie against my chest. I was playing a simple, shorter, version of a song that you had composed yourself. A song you composed for us.

It had taken me at least 20 attempts to get it right, Jasper's patience was endless, even in the face of my frustration. And your reaction was worth everything it had taken.

Your smile grew as we listened to my stumble through our song. The grip of your hand on mine. Your pulse speeding up against my lips, which were pressed against your throat. As the song faded out, you turned to me, grinning and asked, "That is you playing, right?"

I adopted an affronted look, but it broke into a smile before I even got my words out, "Why, was it too good to be me?"

You spun round in my arms so we were chest to chest, before reaching up to cup my cheek, "It was incredible. Thank you."

I had every intention of explaining my reasons behind doing it, and then your lips met mine. Your body was pressed down on mine and every thought beyond getting us both naked flew out of my head.

We stumbled into my bedroom, pulling each other out of our clothes as we went. You were demanding, handing me the bottle of lube almost as soon as you were sat over me on the bed. I wasn't about to refuse, though. The whole day had been building up to this, and as you took hold of my cock, I fumbled with the cap.

We had a quiet moment as you straddled me on the bed, your forehead rested against mine as my fingers worked you until you were ready for me. We were in a cocoon of darkness, so close to each other. My knees were drawn up for you to rest against and I was sat up against the headboard. My free hand was trailing to everywhere it could reach, while yours was tangled in my hair, holding my head to yours, keeping us connected, tilting my head whenever you needed a kiss.

Usually you were happy to let me take charge when we made love, probably by virtue of the fact I had more experience than you. But that night you were in control of everything, rolling a condom onto me when you decided you were prepared enough, before sinking down over me slowly.

The groans that came from both of us were more than enough to signal that you could move whenever you were ready. We had made love with you on top a couple of times, but usually with me guiding your movements. This was all you and I found it hot as hell. I had no idea what had inspired it, maybe it was the confidence boost you got that day. All I knew was you looked fantastic as you moved on me, as you took what you needed from me.

"I love you," you ground out in my ear as you tipped over the edge. I soon followed, done in by the intensity of the day, and our night.

After rolling you over on shaky legs to lie on your back, I grabbed a washcloth to clean you up, and you were asleep before I got back from the bathroom. And as I looked at you, completely at home in my bed – almost too at home as you sprawled out in the center – I knew I had to at least approach talking to you about moving in with me soon.

~-FOF-~

As it was, it was Thanksgiving when I brought it up. Or more accurately, Black Friday, as I had to work Thanksgiving that year.

We sat round eating our Thanksgiving meal in the evening, discussing how you were settling into your new role at work, and how much you were enjoying teaching people to play instruments. I knew that I should head home that evening; I had work early the next morning and I needed to go and sort myself out at home, rather than rushing round in the morning. I didn't want to leave, though. Your new schedule at work combined with mine meant sometimes we didn't see each other for a couple of days. And that was almost unacceptable to me. And so I asked.

"How would you feel about us moving in together?"

You paused in your loading of the dishwasher to look at me. I was leaning against the counter, my casual stance belying how nervous I was about asking you.

"Seriously?"

"Yes, seriously. I hate having to leave you. And I hate that when we have busy schedules we sometimes don't see each other. I want to come home to you every day. Even if some days we only see each other when we sleep, it's better than not seeing you at all. I don't mean right this minute, we can wait until your lease is up next year, or mine if you want to stay here."

I loved my apartment, it really was a home to me, and there were so many memories there, but if you wanted to keep your place I would have given it up.

"I think I want to live together, yeah. But can I have a think about where?"

The shy smile on your face let me know that I had done the right thing by asking, and I crossed the short distance between us and wrapped my arms around you, pressing my lips to yours.

"Take as long as you need, baby. I'm so happy you said yes!" I grinned at you, unable to take the smile off my face.

We finished cleaning up together, discussing some of our options while we did. I had no real preferences, as long as we could live together I didn't care where it was, or whether it was an apartment or a house.

We just skimmed our options, thinking out loud, before it was time for me to leave. I pulled you to me at the door,

"If we were living together already we could be having celebratory sex right now"

You giggled and looked round to make sure no one overheard me, a slight blush appearing, before a cheeky smile overtook your face,

"But if we already lived together, we wouldn't have deciding to live together as a reason to have celebratory sex."

You were so proud of your answer, I couldn't help but tease you back a little,

"Clearly you would be celebrating getting to see me every day, Edward. Every day." I winked, pressed a kiss to your cheek, whispered an 'I love you' before leaving you still slightly stunned in your doorway.

~-FOF-~

And so we found ourselves once again on a hot, sweaty day in June, wearing nothing but basketball shorts when we were indoors, moving your stuff from place to place.

We had decided on my apartment to live in. It was slightly bigger than yours and handier for both of our workplaces.

I looked at the boxes surrounding us, all of your life packed up for the second time in just under 2 years. You were in the bedroom, filling the space I had made in the closet for you, merging your clothes with mine, merging your life with mine.

I grabbed a box of books and took them into the spare room I used as a study. As I unpacked them I smiled, so many books about business, and so many about music education. Jasper's reaction to your ideas had really spurred you on, and you were starting to come out of your shell in work. The music lessons you were giving were going amazingly well, and you had spent a lot of your spare time in the last few weeks going to recitals by some of the kids you taught. I was so pleased to see you thinking about what you wanted from life, about how to improve what you were already doing. You could have been content to sail along in the job you were in, but these books signalled your want for _more _and I can't deny that that attitude made me fall in love with you even more.

When they were all unpacked, I headed back into our bedroom, to find you asleep on the bed. It had been a long day. I dropped a kiss onto your forehead before pulling the comforter over you, and heading out to the kitchen to make us some food.

Our first meal in the apartment we now shared.


	7. Chapter 7

_**Thank you all for the alerts/favourites/reviews. I seriously can't thank you guys enough.  
**_

_____**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. If I did, I would be in the audience of a whole bunch of talk shows this week.**_  


* * *

_The words are hardly out of my mouth before my phone rings. It's you._

_"Edward!"_

_Everyone in the room is listening to me now._

_"I'm 20 minutes away, baby, I'm so sorry! There was a crash in the tunnel, no cell reception to call anyone. I've been freaking out."_

_I let out a laugh of relief._

_"Ok baby, we're all here. Tell Jasper to drive safe. I need you in one piece today. Rose will have your head for messing up the photos if you've got blood on your shirt."_

_I grin at Rosalie, who seems so relieved you've called that she forgets to reprimand me._

_"Be safe, baby. I love you."  
_

_"Love you too Carlisle. I'll see you soon."  
_

_The receiver clicks off but I dont remove the phone from my ear, as the magnitude of the next few hours sinks in.  
_

_20 minutes baby. 20 minutes until the rest of our lives can start._

* * *

Your leg was bouncing like crazy before the plane took off; I was almost tempted to get you some alcohol just to relax you a little.

I didn't though, and settled for holding your hand until we were airborne and the seatbelt sign was turned off. As soon as it was, I moved the armrest between us up, and wrapped my arm around you, pulling you to me until your head was resting on my shoulder.

You were so nervous about meeting my family. You had no reason to be, you had met them via Skype on numerous occasions, but the thought of meeting them in person was infinitely scarier to you. I had reassured you that they loved you, and they did. My mum sent you an email every week, just like she did with me, checking that you were ok and that I was treating you right – and promising to have words with me if I wasn't.

They were really looking forward to our visit, it had been planned for months, and my mum had been driving me crazy with emails just containing links of exciting days out for us. Not that I didn't appreciate them, but she had sent me enough stuff to fill a year, let alone just under 3 weeks.

My mum had been emailing me for lists of your favorite foods, your favorite films, asking whether you preferred eating at restaurants or home-cooked meals, and what "English" experiences you wanted. I answered all her questions, but I knew that all you and I wanted from the trip was for you to feel comfortable with my family. That is what we had been working on since we decided to go and visit.

~-FOF-~

I had been feeling like I needed to visit home for a while. Not homesick, exactly, as I love my new life here, but I missed people back home –it had been over 3 years since I had seen most of them in person.

I struggled with how to bring it up with you for a while. I was tempted to surprise you with tickets for Valentine's Day, or your 21st birthday, but I didn't want to blindside you, or make you feel like it wasn't a joint decision.

I ended up speaking to you about it on an otherwise unremarkable evening. I had been off and cooked you your favorite meal, as an attempt to soften you up a little, and as we curled up on the couch, your head resting in my lap as we watched TV, I started to speak.

"I was wondering how you felt about a holiday?"

"To the cabin?" Your green eyes were on mine now, fully diverted from the TV.

I took hold of your hand, resting them over your chest, "Well, I was thinking somewhere a bit further away really. You have a passport, right?"

Your eyes narrowed slightly in confusion, "Yeah, but I've never used it."

"Ok, well I was thinking we could go to England for my 30th birthday at the end of the year. We could spend a few weeks out there, you could see where I grew up, and I can introduce my family to the most awesome, beautiful boy I've ever met, who I am completely in love with."

You sat up and span back round to face me, bring your legs up onto the sofa, and wrapping your arms around them. Your toes nested under my thigh, and you retook my hand once you were comfortable.

"So we'd stay with your family?"

I had planned for us to, but realised that might not be what you want. "We don't have to for the whole time, I guess, but we would have to stay with them for a few nights at least."

You shook your head, "No, I was just wondering, I guess staying with them is the best option."

I raised an eyebrow at you, unconvinced, and you looked down at our joined hands, avoiding my gaze.

"A few weeks is a long time to stay there if they don't like me."

I knew that that argument was coming, it was one of your greatest fears. You and my mum got on so well, she had essentially taken you on as another son, and you were scared to lose that connection if you met and didn't get along. And even though you never admitted it until much later, your most prominent fear was that my family wouldn't like you, and I would leave you as a result. Crazy boy.

"They love you already, baby. You know that. But we don't have to stay the entire time if you don't want to. Anyway, we have a while to decide that. But if you are happy to go, we should book the flights pretty soon, so have a think about it and let me know."

You nodded, and went back to resting on my lap. I ran my fingers through your hair, watching as your eyes stayed on the TV screen, but your thoughts were clearly elsewhere.

~-FOF-~

As it was, we managed to spare a couple of days off to go to the cabin, too - our cabin, as we now thought of it. We spent a long weekend over your 21st birthday there. It was still tempered by sadness, all your birthdays were, as you missed your parents. We spent a long time sitting by the river that day talking about your mom and dad, and how you think they would feel if they could see you now. Time had given you a bit more perspective on things; your life had gone in a good direction since you had chosen not to go the college route. The two stores were doing really well, and Jasper had started thinking about opening a bar, too, now that both stores were stable. You were confident and happy in your position as assistant manager, and should Jasper open a bar, you would oversee the day to day running of the store while he set up there. But what you really loved was the music lessons. You took such pride in your work, and seeing the kids make such progress in their learning was a huge boost to you. The parents were grateful, the kids loved you, and I loved you more than I ever thought possible because you were truly happy. Happy doing something that you had had the idea for, pitched, and helped to implement. And you had made it a success. All that from my shy boy. Sometimes I forgot you were still so young, the leaps and bounds you had made in the last few years made me forget that, had you have gone to college, you would still have a year before you graduated.

We lay there, and you told me you thought your parents would be proud, even if you didn't choose the path they wanted for you. I was so happy that you had found some peace. It was the one thing that weighed on your mind most heavily. Occasionally I would still find you on the internet looking at colleges where you could go pre-law. It was a huge deal for you to admit that college was not the right path for you, and you had made the best decision in not going.

You were sitting between my legs, your chest to my back, as I leant up against a tree, and I teased you that we were looking very much like a college couple at that moment.

"There's no way you could be half of a college couple, old man." The slightly nervous look on your face as you turned to check I had taken your teasing well made me grin.

"Is that right? I'm still in my 20's, you know." I moved one of my legs from around you, pushing you to lie back on the grass as I leant over you. "Or maybe I could be your professor, is that what you want? I could wear my glasses and a tweed suit, and order you round a bit. You could call me 'sir' if you wanted," I teased.

You rolled your eyes and pushed me off you, "No thanks."

"I'm shocked. Not even the glasses?" I knew full well the effect it had on you on the rare occasion I wore mine.

A slight pink took over your cheeks, "Well, maybe the glasses."

I laughed and pulled you over me, my hands under your t-shirt immediately, rubbing up and down your back slowly.

"Seriously though, I'm proud of you, Edward. You've come so far, and you're doing such good things now."

You ducked your head down into my neck, always so shy in the face of praise. I shuffled to the side a little so you couldn't hide, moving one of my hands up to tease at the nape of your neck.

"You know what the best thing about you in the last few years has been, though?"

You raised an eyebrow, rightly interpreting the teasing lilt to my voice.

"Your choice in boyfriends has been perfect, baby."

~-FOF-~

You were quiet after we disembarked the plane, obviously nervous. I chattered away, reading out a text message from my very excitable mother, which had arrived as soon as I turned my phone back on

"She said 'Welcome home boys, so excited to see you both. Driving your dad crazy because I can't sit still. Will see you when you arrive. Love, Mum.' See, baby! Nothing to worry about."

You gave me a small smile, but you were too far gone to let me calm your nerves now.

After grabbing our bags we headed to pick the rental up, and I pressed you up against the car door after we threw our bags in,

"I love you. I love you no matter what my family think. But they will love you too. They already do. Trust me, baby." I pressed my lips to yours, my hands rubbing up and down your arms, trying to relax you, even a small amount, before we started the journey. It was a drive of a couple of hours from the airport, more than long enough for you to work yourself up into a frenzy if you got into the wrong mindset.

As I drove, I occasionally rested my hand on your leg, reassuring you that I was still there, that I always would be there, as I hummed softly along with the radio.

I glanced over to you, curled up with your head against the window. You'd been like that for the last half hour, it couldn't have been comfortable, but the flight had finally caught up with you and you had dozed off in the passenger seat.

The winding country roads were familiar to me, even in the darkness. I was tired but aware enough to feel comfortable driving. There wasn't too much traffic to contend with at this time of night, especially once we were off the major roads.

The full beam headlights of a lone passing car woke you up, though, and I reached over to rub your leg to comfort you, as you took in your surroundings.

You were adorable in your confused state, blinking rapidly as if it would bring you clarity faster. You were brought round with a yelp as you looked at the road ahead of you.

"Watch the road, Carlisle!"

Slightly confused, I checked around the road as you grew more and more agitated, before asking you what was up.

"You're on the wrong side of the road!"

I grinned. "Baby, we're in England, remember? I am most definitely now on the right side of the road."

The momentary confusion on your face made me smile, as it gave way to understanding, and then to a huge yawn.

"You can go back to sleep if you want, we've got a little while before we get there, yet."

You shook your head, and your hand flew to your neck immediately.

"Stiff?" I grinned and reached over to squeezed your thigh.

You rolled your eyes, otherwise ignoring my – admittedly terrible – attempt at a crass joke, "I must have slept funny, my neck is sore."

I didn't need to shift gears any time soon, so I rested my arm over your shoulder, my fingers gently teasing at your neck, trying to relieve the soreness there for you. The last thing you needed was added issues when meeting my family.

The rest of the journey flew past, travelling at night was so much easier, and I had managed to get some sleep on the plane so the long drive wasn't too taxing.

We chatted, quietly, about what to expect. You had spoken to all of my family on Skype at some point, but I told you about their personalities again. They were all very different people so I took the time to remind you of what was normal for each of them, so that nothing would be a huge surprise. You were quieter and quieter as the time went on, and when I told you there was about five minutes before we got there, I could feel your whole body tense under my hand.

I quietly reassured you the rest of the way there, your fear of rejection by my family was something I never understood, but I knew I had to do everything I could to keep your nerves at bay.

Pulling up into the driveway of my parents' house, I squeezed your hand and leant over to give you a quick kiss, and then jumped out to grab our bags before my mother descended on us.

She was too quick for me, though, and was out the house while I was still fighting with our bags. I gave up for a second and turned to greet her, but she completely passed me by and had gathered you into a hug before I knew what was happening.

The look on your face was priceless, shock giving way to relief, as you looked at me over her shoulder. I shrugged and grinned, knowing that you probably appreciated her gesture more than even you knew.

Once the last bag was out of the car I walked over to you, the sight of you both together amusing me. My mum was about a foot shorter than you, but was fussing all over you, and you looked younger than your 21 years, as she held the top of your arms and talked at you intently. For your part, you took it all well, quietly maybe, but I knew your signs, and my mother's overt friendliness hadn't rattled you beyond the initial surprise.

"Not missed me then, Mum?"

She turned away from you, and my eyes flicked to yours as I sent you a quick, reassuring grin.

"Of course I've missed you, but this poor boy has just had to deal with your driving for the last two hours. I had to make sure he wasn't traumatised by the experience." She pulled me into a hug to the sound of your giggles.

"I slept most of the way, so it wasn't too scary."

I shook my head, whispering a quick "Thank you" to my mum, for helping you relax, as I twisted out of her hug to help my dad – who had come outside without anyone noticing, and was moving our bags inside.

"I see how it is, gang up on me. Shocking. And my own mother instigating it, I'm so hurt!"

It was your turn to roll your eyes at me, as my mother linked arms with you and dragged you into the house to make us a hot chocolate, giving you a quick introduction to my dad on the way past.

"Nice to meet you, Dr Cullen," rang out, practically from the kitchen, as my mum was on a mission, and not stopping for anyone.

I was quite glad, though, it meant your introduction to my dad was over quickly, and then there was only Emmett left to deal with, who had been away with work and wasn't due back until the next evening.

As we hefted the bags inside, we made small talk about the journey. My dad was a man of few words, he was the calm to my mother's storm, but he offered his first impression of you when I quietly asked for it.

"He seems nice. And if he can handle your mother's particular brand of madness, then he is welcome here any time he wants."

And that was it.

As we sat in the living room, drinking our drinks and quietly chatting, your hand firmly in mine, I knew that we were going to be just fine for the next two weeks.

~-FOF-~

Our time in England flew past. I had so many things I wanted to show you, parts of my life that were important to me, and more tourist-type things I thought you would enjoy.

We spent a whole day touring the towns near where I grew up. Country fields and walks, and tiny shops to visit. The weather was terrible, and we were bundled up against the elements – you looked exceptionally cute with your jacket zipped up and over your mouth and a hat on, and a pink nose from the cold wind - but we had a brilliant day just wandering round.

I told you stories from when I was growing up. I told you about the time me and Emmett had used some of our mum's best towels as seats in a den we made in the woods, and how annoyed she was with us for it. I told you about the day Emmett had annoyed me so much I had walked off and left him alone in the woods - he was 9 and I was nearly 11 – and I had been halfway back to our house before I got so worried that I ran back and searched for him. It took me an hour to find him. He was absolutely fine, busy trying to make a fire with sticks that were too wet to actually do anything, and completely nonplussed by being alone.

You had got on fairly well with Emmett; he was so loud and boisterous – even at 28 – that he compensated for your shyness around him. He had taken to telling you a kids joke every time he saw you – arguing it was the only humour he could use round you, given your young age. You confessed to me that you were worried about it as we were curled up in bed one night, but I explained he didn't mean anything by it, your age wasn't a _bad_ thing. It was just his weird sense of humour. And his intention was to wind me up, not you. And after that, you took it with good humour. By the end of the holiday you were shushing him whenever he swore, reminding him you only had young ears. And I was so proud of you.

I showed you the schools I went to, and you laughed for longer than I felt necessary at the uniform I had to wear. As was the case with most school uniforms, it really wasn't the height of fashion.

You and my mum were thick as thieves and the minute we got home from our walk that day you were away from me and talking to her. I was suspicious, but desperately in need of a shower to warm up, and so paid you only passing attention as I went upstairs. I came back down to what can only be described as a photo explosion. My mum had every photo album she could get her hands on out, as well as all my framed school pictures. Your giggles could be heard throughout the house as my mum offered to make us copies of any we wanted to take back home.

Coming up behind you, embarrassed but happy to see you so relaxed, I wrapped my arms around you and nipped you on the neck, gently, "I'm pretty sure that won't be necessary, mum. Thanks anyway."

I sent her a playful glare and she shrugged back at me, always happy for an excuse to show off pictures of her boys.

After showing you a few of her favourites – which were remarkably similar to the ones I would deem 'most embarrassing.' I can't think why - she left us to look through them to make us an evening meal. We offered to help but she refused, telling you that I wouldn't get the photos out for you again anytime soon, so you should make the most of it.

We spent a long time looking through the pictures; I was telling you the stories of the ones I could remember. We laughed at the terrible haircuts I had sported, and the fashions that never really got any better. I showed you the holiday destinations I had loved, and promised to take you some day, so we could take our own photos that we could look back on and laugh at.

Our camera was almost permanently out after that evening. We spent a few days staying in London, taking in the sights and doing generally tourist-type things while we were there. One of my favourite photos is of us on the London Eye. It's one of those typical arms-length photos, we weren't there at the height of tourist season so we had a pod to ourselves and therefore no one to take the photo for us, but the huge smiles on our faces reflect exactly how happy we were that day. The photo sits on my desk at work now, and always brings a smile to my face.

We ended up with photos of you next to some of the guards at Buckingham Palace, standing by Big Ben, I even got you to a soccer match – despite all your protests that it wasn't as good as any of the main American sports. But I persuaded you with the argument that there were men in shorts and tight t-shirts. I think you quite enjoyed the game in the end.

The other thing our trip to London afforded us was some privacy. You were reluctant to have sex while we were staying at my parents' house, afraid we would be overheard by my parents, or worse, Emmett. So we made full use of the room we had booked while we were away.

Being away from home had made you freer somehow, your normal reservation was replaced by adventurousness. I wasn't sure where it had come from, but as you had me pressed against the wall of the elevator of our hotel after a night out, I wasn't about to complain.

We hadn't been out much at home, choosing not to take advantage of the fact that you were 21 in that way yet. But, free of work obligations, we decided to go out in the capital city on our last night there, and had an amazing time. You probably drank a little too much, your terrible hangover the next day proving that. But being out with you, dancing with you, and you grinding against me, full of alcohol-induced wickedness is something I will never forget. I stayed relatively sober, knowing from early on that you were letting go that night. It was lucky I did, because even with only a few drinks in me, I was almost ready to do as you were begging and find a dark corner where I could touch you in relative privacy. Alcohol had loosened your tongue completely, and you had spent about an hour whispering increasingly naughty things in my ear, knowing how much it turned me on, trying to get what you wanted from me.

"Please, Carlisle? I need you. I need you so bad. I want to suck your cock, and then i need you inside me. Please?"

Your lips were on my neck, and your hands were on my ass, holding our bodies so close together. And I snapped. I had held out for as long as I could, wanting us to have a good night, but that pushed me over the edge.

"Drink up. It's time we were in a room where I can get you naked."

The desperation carried on all the way back to the hotel. We almost gave the taxi driver a free show, and whoever was working in the camera room at the hotel too. But I eventually got you into the room and had no hesitation in doing everything you had been pleading for all night. Your hands and mouth were everywhere on me as I brought you to the brink over and over. You had been so wound up all night and I wanted every word that I could tease from you. I wanted to draw out everything you had been holding back from me. I knew drinking would let your walls down a little, and I also knew it wasn't something you liked to do often, so I took full advantage of your newfound boldness.

You dictated everything that night, except for the pace. My hands went where you moved them, my mouth teased wherever you asked me to, and I pushed inside of you when you finally couldn't take any more teasing.

You were vocal and demanding, and I loved it. I learnt so much about how you liked to be teased, and touched. Our sex life had always been good, but you had no filter, and no problem telling me exactly how you liked it. I thanked God I was sober enough to retain the information for future reference, because it has proved way more useful than I ever thought possible.

I felt a little bad the next day, when your muscles were aching along with your head. But as we lay and talked about it, you shyly confessed that you had enjoyed demanding things of me, even if you wouldn't feel comfortable doing it often.

You slept the whole train ride home, your head on my shoulder. My mum picked us up from the train station, to save us getting a taxi, and as you dozed off again in the car, immediately chastised me for letting you get so drunk you had a hangover at all.

"He is 21, you know, Mum. More than capable of making his own decisions. And he needed to let loose a little I think. He's been stressed about this trip, and even though he's happy he's getting along with you guys, he doesn't ever fully relax. He's always nervous something will happen to make you hate him."

"Bless him, he has seemed a little nervous sometimes. But it's no excuse for taking him out and getting him drunk, he still seems so young. He needs someone to look out for him, Carlisle."

"I did! I stayed sober. I can't believe I'm nearly 30 and having this argument with you," I raised my eyebrows at her, knowing she was watching me in the rear view mirror.

"Edward doesn't have a mum anymore, so I'm playing that role too, ok? I just care about him, Carlisle, he's a lovely boy – well, man – and I like seeing him happy. I like you being happy together."

I glanced down at you, your head in my lap, my fingers running through your hair, needing the connection as my ability to look out for you was being called into question. I knew you were asleep and weren't even aware of me doing it, but it offered me some comfort to do it, and you loved me doing it when you were awake, so I hoped on a subconscious level you knew I was there. "We are, Mum. We're really happy. He's everything to me."

I couldn't be mad at her, I wasn't really mad in the first place. She was being completely honest with me, she really did – and still does - care for you as if you were her own son.

Later that evening we sat around in our living room talking about our trip. You had almost recovered from the hangover, although you were still fairly quiet, only adding additional comments as I told the stories from our trip.

Emmett came in halfway through the evening, only pausing in the doorway for a minute before heading upstairs to get ready to go back out to the pub.

"Hey Eddie! Why was six afraid of seven?"

You shook your head – gently. "I dunno."

"Because seven eight nine! Get it?"

A small groan was your only response.

"Hey! That was a good one!" He looked over at what we were doing, holding the camera with all our photos on, and a smirk came over his face.

"Did you guys have a good time? I hope you finally got the bed shaking a little bit, your room has been way too quiet, it might help C loosen up a bit." He grinned, knowing exactly the reactions he was getting from everyone in the room, as we all sat in a slightly stunned silence.

My dad spoke up with a quiet, "Really, Emmett?" But he had got the reaction he wanted and shot me a grin, ever the annoying little brother, even at our age.

"I'm off to get ready anyway, enjoy showing your snaps off, hope there are no nudes in there!"

And the room was left in an awkward silence. We were well used to Emmett's crass comments, but it was new to you, and your cheeks were pink with embarrassment as you turned your head into my shoulder.

My mum was first to react, "Oh Edward, ignore him. He just likes getting a reaction. You're grown men, you can do what you want. I'm sorry if he made you uncomfortable though, I'll have words with him later. Parenting is never finished, it seems." She gave me a pointed look, which earned her a roll of my eyes, while I squeezed your hand and leant down to kiss the top of your head.

We headed to bed shortly after that, the night having taken a somewhat awkward turn, especially when we knew that Emmett was closer to home with his comment than either of us would ever want my parents to be thinking about.

Our roles were polar opposite from the night before, as we slid into bed and you curled up in my arms.

"Don't worry about what he said, baby. No one takes him seriously anyway. But my parents know we're grown men, they know we live together, it's not like he told them anything they didn't already know, really. It won't cause problems, I promise. Except I need to kick his ass somehow, tomorrow."

You nodded, lifting your head up to drop a quick kiss on my lips, before pulling back to look at me. Your cheeks were still a little pink, but your gaze was strong and confident.

"I know, Carlisle. We'll be fine."

* * *

**AN#2: Holy long chapter Batman. Carlisle wouldn't stop talking, so sorry the post is a little later in the day than usual (and thank you to Bedelia who held my hand as I freaked out this morning).  
**

**I know I don't usually do extra ANs but this one is needed.**

**First, yay italic Edward is ok! I know a few of you were concerned. Dont worry. This is essentially fluff.  
**

**Second, I am 90 percent certain I won't be able to update next week. Long story short, I have 2 degree level essays to write this week. They are half done, and if they get finished quick, then I might be able to get ch8 done _but _it's unlikely, and I want to give the chapter my full attention. So, if there is no update on Sunday, there will be a teaser for ch8 on the Fictionators the day after, and it'll be up the Sunday after. It wont be more than the 2 weeks, I promise.  
**


	8. Chapter 8

_**Thank you all for the alerts/favourites/reviews. We hit over 50 reviews this week which I never expected, so thank you. Honestly.  
**_

_____**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. If I did, I would be insisting that Carlisle and Edward had numerous promo photos together.**_

* * *

_"Dr Cullen, this can't wait much longer."_

_I'm back to tearing my hair out._

_It's been 15 minutes since your call, and they're telling me that we're running out of time. If we don't get in now, we won't get in at all._

_"Five minutes, that's all we need. I swear he's almost here"_

_"Ok, you have five minutes Dr Cullen. But if you miss it, that's it."_

* * *

"Edward, it's just Emmett. He won't care about how clean the apartment is. He won't care about anything as long as we have a T.V. and a full fridge."

Being a teacher, Emmett had every Christmas off, and had decided to come over to visit. I'm not sure whether it was seeing us he was interested in – unlikely, as we had only left England a few weeks earlier – or whether it was meeting Jasper's sister. You had been showing my family some photos from the store, Rosalie was on one, and Emmett announced his love for her immediately. He was convinced she would love him too, and had booked a flight for Christmas, that afternoon.

"He might not care, but what if your mom asks him what the place is like?" You had been completely stressed out before his arrival, ridiculously, and nothing I said made it any better. So I left you to the cleaning, while I went out to stock the fridge up. I hadn't been joking about him only caring what was in the fridge.

I was looking forward to him meeting Rosalie. We had arranged a night out for us all a couple of days after he arrived, so that they could be introduced. She was classically beautiful, blonde hair, blue eyes and curvy. Although she obviously did nothing for me, I could admit she was gorgeous, and I had seen the effect she had on men first hand. I also knew her personality, though, and she didn't take any shit from anyone. I was looking forward to Emmett having to work for what he wanted. And maybe being taken down a peg or two while he was at it.

~-FOF-~

I had exacted some revenge on him while we were in England for the comment that had made you so embarrassed.

I woke him up early the next day, knowing full well he would have a hangover, and had volunteered him to help build a new shed for my mum. Lots of hammering and having to bend over and move round. Anything that would make the recovery worse for him. I even brought a radio outside for him, turned up as loud as I could –mindful of our neighbours.

And I hid the painkillers.

Our parents ended up going out to buy some paint for the shed, pleased to have a rare rain-free few days predicted, and knowing we would be done by the afternoon, so I decided to rub salt into the wound.

"Hey, Em? I'm going to go upstairs. Get the bed shaking with Edward, you know? You'd best start working a bit faster if you're going to get that shed up before mum and dad come home."

And with that, I left him to it.

You were awake when I got into our bedroom, part way through getting dressed for the day. I halted all progress you had made, but you didn't complain once my lips were round you.

Emmett found us later, cuddled up on the couch. We had put a movie on but I was far more interested in teasing your neck with my kisses, my hands under your t-shirt. I felt like a teenager, making out with you on my parents couch while they were out, and I liked it.

"I knew I shouldn't have left you alone, doesn't Eddie still need a chaperone?"

Fresh air had obviously helped Emmett get over his hangover, unfortunately. I sat up properly, and you followed, resting your head on my shoulder and your hand just under my t-shirt, playing at the line above my waistband, before you turned to Emmett and answered his enquiry.

"Are you offering, Emmett? You can if you want, but I'm not sure you'd want to see the stuff we got up to."

I grinned at Emmett, and my hand that was resting on your bicep gave it a squeeze, just to let you know I was happy you had found your voice.

"Go Eddie! A few more of them and you'll be one of the family." He leant down and grabbed a drink off the table, giving you a wink as he did, before his eyes went back to the TV.

"What are we watching, anyway? Restart it, I bet you've seen none of it. I'll grab some food. Boys afternoon in!"

As Emmett busied himself in the kitchen, I pulled back so I could see your face, bringing my hand up to cup your cheek, my thumb running across your lips, "Well done baby, I'm proud of you." And I was. I leant down to softly kiss your lips as your hand fisted my t-shirt. It was an exercise in restraint, both of us clearly affected by the moment.

We broke apart just before Emmett came back in, carrying enough food for a family. Throwing it onto the table he flopped down onto the couch next to us. "What did I miss? Wait. Judging by the looks on your faces I don't want to know. Just play the film."

I rolled my eyes, starting the movie off. My hand played with the hair at the nape of your neck throughout the movie, I was eager to keep contact with you, the need to keep you close to me was strong.

And that was how our parents found us, my mum was clearly pleased to see us all sitting together and getting on ok.

"Emmett, I hope you apologised to Edward for what you said yesterday."

He groaned and without taking his eyes off the TV screen, explained, "No, but Carlisle made me pay for it all morning, and Eddie grew some balls this afternoon, so we're cool now. It's fine."

There was a slight pause while everyone digested what Emmett had just said. I felt your body tense up next to me, and I shot an exasperated glare at Emmett, before a laugh erupted out of you. It was infectious, and before I knew it we were all giggling, my mum and dad sitting on the other couch to watch the rest of the movie with us. Emmett rolled his eyes, grabbing the remote control from me and turning the volume up, annoyed he couldn't hear what was going on over our laughing.

~-FOF-~

While in England we celebrated my 30th birthday. It was a few weeks early, but my mum was insistent that we did something to mark the occasion while we were all together.

We ended up at a restaurant a couple of days before we flew home, an Italian in the next town along from ours. Emmett had complained about having to dress up for it, my dad had complained about having to eat either pizza or pasta and my mum had complained about everyone complaining when it was my birthday.

We took a separate car from the others, in case we wanted to go on anywhere else afterwards. You were quiet, looking out of the window as we drove, and not saying much. We arrived at the restaurant first, and as we sat in the car waiting, I took the time to apologise for my family.

You just smiled. "It's fine. My dad always used to complain if we didn't go to a steakhouse when we went out. It kinda reminded me of that, I liked it."

I reached over and laced my fingers with yours, giving your hand a squeeze.

"Our dads would have got on well then, hey?" My thumb teased over yours, trying to offer you some comfort, always keen to encourage you to talk about your family.

"Yeah I guess they would have done. Our moms would have got on really well. Except they'd probably argue over who would be sending us the best care packages. But then they'd sit and gossip about us on the phone for hours, planning our wedding or something."

My hand froze in its motions over yours, as you tensed up realising what you'd said. We'd never discussed marriage before, although we were both clear that we were in this for the long haul.

"Wedding, huh?" I teased.

"Well... you know... It's just something moms do. Isn't it? Arrange their kids weddings for them, take over and stuff. I didn't mean anything by it. Necessarily."

I smiled at your rambling, pulling our joined hands to my lips before I got out of the car, ignoring the drizzling rain, and came around to your side.

You clambered out, the tips of your ears still a little pink, and I grasped the side of your jacket to pull you close to me.

"I love you, Edward. And one day I really, really hope my mum can ring us up and annoy us with wedding plans." I glanced up, seeing my dad's car pulling into the lot, "But we're going to do the asking thing properly, when we have the whole night to ourselves to celebrate. Not when we have an evening with my parents and brother to look forward to. Yeah?"

You nodded, your eyes sparkling in the lights coming from the building. I smiled at you, almost overwhelmed by the declaration we had just shared. The moment was shattered by Emmett's booming voice, whinging about the rain. I pressed a light kiss to your lips, before grabbing your hand and walking us over to the door of the restaurant, where my family were waiting for us.

The meal was the last time we would all be together before we left to go back home, and I had been looking forward to a good send off, with a few drinks, and some good memories. But the evening is just a blur now; all I could concentrate on was you. You were sitting next to me, your leg brushing against mine, my hand occasionally taking yours, or reaching up to play at the back of your neck while you talked. You were at home with my family, my Mum adored you, my Dad quietly admired your strength, and you had won Emmett over by standing your ground with him. My family were in love with you, I was in love with you, and you loved us. It was perfect.

~-FOF-~

Emmett arrived at our apartment in a whirlwind of chaos, and a barrage of bad jokes, as if he could ever do anything less. We offered to let him nap after we ate the lunch you had made for us, but he was insistent that jet lag hadn't affected him and he was fine.

We had a relaxed afternoon, showing him a few sights around the apartment within walking distance, before picking up a couple of pizzas and heading back to the apartment. He wasn't very interested in the sights, instead choosing to spend the time questioning us about Rosalie – what she liked, what she didn't like, what sort of men she dated, whether she liked my accent. He was convinced that being from the UK would work to his advantage.

I didn't know Rosalie very well, and so I let you field his questions as best you could, occasionally jumping in and trying to deflect him to talk about other things. It was largely unsuccessful, although we made tentative plans to try and get to a football game while he was visiting.

As we got back to the apartment, Emmett took the pizzas through with him as he sprawled out on the couch. I pulled you into the kitchen with me, under the pretext of getting some drinks, and wrapped my arms around your waist, holding you close to me and kissing your forehead. "Thank you, for putting up with my crazy brother. Again. And I apologise in advance for any trouble he causes."

You laughed and twisted out of our embrace to grab some drinks. "He's not so bad. And I didn't mind answering his questions." You handed me some glasses and headed to the kitchen door before turning back to me, grinning and talking loudly enough so Em could hear, "Besides, if he can get together with Rosalie maybe he'll bug her all vacation instead of us!"

I laughed, surprised I hadn't heard any noises of indignation from my little brother, who was normally unafraid to make his voice heard at any point.

As I walked through into the other room, I realised why. Em was sprawled out on our couch, taking up the entire thing, and starting to snore.

I turned to you, knowing there was no point trying to wake him up, "Pizza and then an evening in bed, baby? He is out for the count now."

You smiled, grabbing the pizza boxes off the table, and headed into the kitchen, while I scrawled a note for Emmett letting him know we couldn't wake him and that he should just go to bed when he wakes up.

As we ate, we chatted quietly about the next few weeks. I had used a lot of my vacation time to go to England, so I couldn't afford to take much time off to spend with Emmett, and you were busy at work, too. We had tried to match our shifts up so that he wasn't alone too much, but he hadn't really given us enough time to figure anything out. You were taking him down to the store with you the next day, as you lived closer to town than we lived, so he could meet Jasper and then spend the day having a look around town.

The next day he was on his own, and then that night was the night out with Jasper, Alice and Rosalie.

You looked beautiful that night in fitted jeans and a t-shirt that showed off all of your muscles. I could hardly keep my hands off you.

We had agreed to go to a quiet bar, so we could chat and have a few drinks. Most of us were working the next day so no one wanted a night out at a club, apart from Em, who was annoyed he would lose the chance to win Rosalie over with his dancing skills. He didn't take too kindly to me suggesting that her not seeing how badly he danced could work in his advantage.

Jasper, Alice and Rosalie were already at the bar when we arrived, so when we picked up our drinks, we went and joined them in a booth. You ended up next to Alice, with me next to you, while Emmett and Rosalie were at either end of the booth, opposite each other. We quickly introduced everyone and – as I hadn't seen Jasper since our vacation – we delved straight into a conversation about how the trip back to England had gone.

Emmett displayed no hint of nerves, joining in our conversations with gusto. We ended up talking about growing up in England, and the differences that we had noticed. Emmett and I had both been to a boys-only secondary school, and you took the opportunity to describe the school uniform to the others in great detail, adding in a few comments about the haircuts you had seen on the photos my mum had showed you.

I pinched your side gently for teasing us, as Emmett proclaimed that it was a good job the school was boys only, as the girls would never have been able to concentrate if he was around, distracting them with his good looks, "Some of the boys were distracted as it was!"

Rosalie rolled her eyes, but as they both went up to the bar together, we all started discussing them. Jasper was convinced that Rosalie was interested in Emmett, and we already knew that Em was head over heels for her. We looked over at them, deep in conversation at the bar, and I had a feeling my brother was going to get exactly what he wanted.

~-FOF-~

I had been right, and we had hardly seen Emmett for the rest of his vacation. He spent Christmas day with us – meaning I couldn't have you naked all day for me for Christmas, which is what I had asked for. I called in that present the next day, though.

Any time we did see Emmett, it was usually along with Rosalie, who appeared to be as crazy about him as he was about her. It was good to see my little brother happy, but it was tinged with sadness for them, knowing that he was going back to England in 2 weeks. He seemed to be making plans, though, and I was glad that he wasn't coming over and causing chaos and leaving us to deal with it.

He left between Christmas and New Year, needing a few days at home before school started again. We were going to go for a meal out to say goodbye to him, but we ended up just going to Rosalie's apartment with a takeout as Rose and Em were unwilling to separate themselves enough to be out in public. We only stayed for a couple hours, leaving them to their goodbyes. I was driving Em to the airport the next morning, so there was no need for us to monopolise him.

He was so quiet on the drive, and as I hugged him at the airport, he wrapped his arms round me, pulling me into one of his bear hugs.

"Look after her, C. Please?"

I swallowed, a little choked up by hearing my little brother so affected. "Of course I will, Em. Edward will too. I promise. "

We made good on that promise, descending on Rosalie the next day with DVDs and junk food, and a whole army of embarrassing stories about Emmett from when he was growing up.

She was quiet, but pleased we were there, and we developed a routine of spending one or two evenings a week with her. You and Rosalie became especially close, a friendship that is so important to you, still.

~-FOF-~

When we weren't working, or hanging out with our friends, or spending time together, I was busy making plans. Trying to keep things secret from you was a challenge, but with some help, I managed it.

Finally, on an otherwise unremarkable day in January, all the planning came together.

I found myself wishing that I had worked that day. Spending all day at home waiting for the evening to come drove me crazy.

I text you a few times throughout the day, but I was acutely aware of letting something slip inadvertently, and so I limited our contact to less than usual. I rang Jasper to ensure you would be out of work on time, rang the restaurant to check our reservation, cleaned the apartment completely, caught up on a few medical journals and still found myself with time to kill.

By the time you came home I had wound myself up into a frenzy, and trying to keep a lid on my nervous energy was difficult. I clearly didn't do a very good job of it, dragging you into the shower to get cleaned up with me, and then trying to keep my hands to myself while we were in there.

You were clearly confused by my behavior, but I shrugged off your concern, telling you I had missed you, but hadn't noticed how little time we had before we needed to leave to make our reservation.

I left you in the shower, as I sat on our bed and tried to pull myself together, knowing I wasn't far off blowing everything.

We got ready to go out quickly, you hated wearing smarter clothes but you looked amazing in black pants and a smart shirt, I almost didn't want to leave the apartment.

"Are you ready, or are you just going to stare at me for the rest of the night?"

Your voice pulled me out of my thoughts, and I took a deep breath and gave you a grin.

"Yes baby, I'm ready."

I grabbed my jacket, patting the pockets to check I had everything I needed, before taking your hand and heading down to the car.

We were tucked away in a corner at the restaurant, offering us a semblance of privacy. You had had a really good day at work, the kids you were teaching were coming along well, parents had been praising you all day, and you had had some time to do a bit of composing in between lessons, too. I had no control of the day you had at work, but it felt like everything had come together perfectly.

You chatted away while we ate, I was happy to let the conversation fall to you, as I concentrated on trying to force down some food past my nerve-induced nausea.

We passed on dessert, thankfully, and I drove us down to the waterfront, a place where we had spent so much time over the last few years.

It was a cold evening, and you looked at me like I was crazy when I suggested a walk. I smiled and shrugged, trying to keep my voice nonchalant.

"I just thought it'd be a nice way to walk off the meal. We won't be out long, baby. I promise."

"If I get frostbite I hope you know what to do, Dr Cullen," you teased as you climbed out the car.

I locked the car and came around to you, pressing you back against the door, "Baby, you _know_ I know exactly how to keep you warm. And I will make sure you are plenty warm enough when we get home, trust me."

Our bodies were completely up against each other, I could feel your reaction to what I said through your slacks, and I was sure you could feel my reaction to you calling me "Dr Cullen." I moved away from you, needing to not get distracted and drag you back home before the end of my plan came together.

We walked hand in hand along the waterfront, and I brought the conversation round to our first date.

"I was so nervous. I liked you so much, and I was scared I would say something that made you think I was too young for you or something." You smiled, remembering how well it went. I squeezed your hand in mine as we came across the place where we first kissed, ostensibly to reassure you, but it was a gesture I needed to make, to reassure myself, too.

This was the moment, and I was nervous as hell. I took a deep breath before turning to you with a smile, "Fancy recreating a few scenes?"

You nodded, and we scrambled down to where we were that first time.

I pulled you into me. My hands found their way into your hair, and yours roamed over my back as we took a second just to look at each other, both of us with wide smiles. And I knew that this was it.

One of my hands trailed down from your hair, rubbing along your arm before I dropped a kiss on your lips, to distract you from wondering why my hand was suddenly off your body and in my pocket.

It was only meant to be a quick kiss, but you moaned into it and the floodgates opened momentarily. One of your hands was toying with the buttons on my shirt and I knew I had to stop before we got too into it.

Breathing heavily, I moved back an inch or so, resting my forehead against yours.

"I love you, baby."

"I love you too, Carlisle."

I opened my eyes to see your green ones sparkling back at me, and the moment was just right.

Stepping back, I started my often-rehearsed speech, praying that I wouldn't mess it up.

"Edward. The first time we were here, I never imagined that we would be where we are today. I might have hoped, but I never thought it was possible. You were so sweet, so shy, and so unsure about your life and I didn't have a clue what I had done to deserve you."

You made to interrupt but I barrelled on.

"And now we have all this, you've carved out a niche for yourself at work, and you have firmly embedded yourself in my heart and my life. And I love it. I love you. I love that you blush whenever I give you compliments, I love that you put up with my family, I love that always text me during the day- even when you know I can't reply- just to say you miss me, I love that you miss me, I love that you are such an important part of my life that I spend every day either enjoying your company, or wishing I was in it. I love you so much, Edward. I don't know what I would do without you, and I never want to find out."

I took a deep breath, your eyes were filled with tears, as you had clearly sussed out what was happening. I took hold of your hand with my free hand, and dropped down to one knee.

I fumbled opening the box one-handed, and you let out a nervous giggle, dropping down to help me open it.

I rolled my eyes, "Well... it almost went perfectly. Get back up so I can pretend I was smooth!"

You shook your head, pressing a kiss to my lips. "We're equals. If you're down here I want to be down here with you. I love you."

Your reasoning made me smile, you were right, we were in this together.

I laughed, "Ok baby. I'm out of my flow now. But the sentiment remains! Will you make me the happiest man in the world by agreeing to marry me?"

You nodded, tears spilling over from both of us as we sat in one of the most positionally awkward hugs we had ever shared. It was the most perfect hug we ever shared, though. I grabbed the ring out of its box, I had managed to find a men's engagement ring that I thought you would be happy to wear.

"I wasn't sure what to do about me, baby. If you wanted us to match or if you wanted to pick one out for me yourself. I don't mind. I'm just happy you said yes."

"Of course I said yes. I love you. I want to be with you forever. And we can go ring shopping on our next day off, and decide then."

I kissed your forehead - grabbing my cell phone to take a quick picture of us in our post-proposal bliss - before standing up and helping you do the same.

"Ok baby, sounds good to me. Now, much as I love this moment, let's go home. I'm freezing and I want to celebrate with my fiancé, with no need for frostbite treatment for either of us. It would seriously limit everything I want to do to you."


	9. Chapter 9

_**Thank you all for the alerts/favourites/reviews. Your responses make me smile, and I treasure every one of them.  
**_

_____**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. If I did, all promotional pics of the Cullen boys would be taken in Hawaii. On the beach.**_

* * *

_The door bursts open and you rush through it. You look stressed, your hair has been pulled in every direction imaginable, your tie is loose, your top button is undone. And you look hotter than hell. You walk up to me, not even sparing a glance for anyone else in the room, grab my hand and start pulling me towards the other door in the room._

_"Through there?"_

_I nod._

_"Let's do this. I love you."_

* * *

We waited a few days to announce our engagement to my family. It was more by accident than design, but the break to enjoy the news without having to answer a thousand and one questions about the wedding was nice.

Alice had been visiting the store and had spotted the ring immediately when you went back into work, and we were signed up for a celebratory night out before we knew it. She was insistent that she organise the night for us, and we ended up at a beautiful restaurant.

We were still in our post-proposal bliss, hardly able to keep our hands off each other long enough to eat. We just about managed to stay respectable in public, despite the amount of champagne we were drinking, Alice promising that we would soon have the chance to get close enough.

I had assumed she meant we would be heading home after the meal, but I was wrong, as we bundled into Jasper's car and drove to a parking lot near a row of clubs. We left our jackets in the car, and I took my tie off, knowing we would be warm in the club, despite it being cold outside.

We weren't concentrating on where we were going, my awareness sapped by your proximity as we walked along to the club, but when we went in, I suddenly realised where we were.

The club was filled with men, some in various states of undress, some just sitting chatting. It was a spectrum of the scene, and I immediately turned to you to check you were ok with this. Although we had got no hassle in the club we had been to in London, we were yet to visit a club together like this. But your eyes showed only a hint of nerves, you were excited to be there. And that meant I was more than excited to be there with you.

Alice and Jasper went to get some drinks for us all, while we walked through to try and find a table. We were pushed together as we walked past the dancefloor and I took advantage of the moment to take hold of your hips and grind my erection against your ass, as I dropped some kisses on your neck. Your eyes fell shut and your head leant back against my shoulder, and I smiled, getting physical proof that you were as affected as I was.

We eventually found a table and Alice and Jasper joined us just as you were about to climb on my lap – I think. I was pressed against the end of the booth as your hands were under my shirt, your lips teasing at my jawline. It was rare for you to be so bold in public, and I wasn't about to stop you. It wasn't until Jasper cleared his throat that you moved back, your blush detectable even in the dim lights.

I rested my hand on your thigh, rubbing small circles with my thumb as you looked around the club. We were in a relatively quiet area, but we could see the dancefloor from where we sat, and your eyes were trained on the mass of men dancing down there.

Alice noticed your distraction and grabbed you up to dance with her. You looked to me and I gave you a smile, letting you know I didn't mind, and you happily went with her. I scooted to the end of the bench, knowing I needed to get a good look at you dancing down there, so that I could step in if you needed any help, and so that I could enjoy the view.

"He's having a good night tonight," Jasper noted, as we watched you spin Alice under your arm.

I grinned at the sight, "Yeah, he is. It's not often we go out, but when we do he loves it. Once he loses his inhibitions a little, anyway."

"I think it's probably a little more than that. He is happy when he's with you, no matter where he is, you can almost feel it radiating off him." I tore my eyes away from you to look at Jasper, his blue eyes so serious and shrugged.

"We make each other happy. I love him and he loves me. I'm not as daft as to say that's all we need, but it's a good start."

Jasper leant forward and after a quick glance at you, I turned my attention back to him.

"Look, Carlisle. I like you, I really do. And I feel so awkward doing this because you so obviously love Edward, but he has no one on his side to do this for him, so I have to. I probably should have said it before you proposed to be honest, but I wasn't sure it was my place. Just know, if you hurt him, I will kick your ass into next year. And now that your brother is in love with my sister, I bet I could persuade him to join me in the ass kicking. So just... carry on as you are. Because I really don't want to have to do that."

It took me a minute to digest what he said, and his eyes boring into mine didn't help, but when I did, I couldn't help but smile. "Number one, I'm glad he has someone there for him, I really am. Number 2, I love him to death. I will do everything I can not to hurt him. And number 3, if I do hurt him, I will come to your house and hand you some sturdy boots ready for the kicking." Jasper laughed, and I shot you another glance, your head thrown back in laughter as Alice demonstrated some... interesting ... moves to you. "I'm serious. The thought of hurting him makes me feel sick. I'm in this for life, I wouldn't have proposed if I wasn't. But thank you Jasper, it makes me happy he has people like you on his side."

He nodded, "Ok, now that's out the way, let's never mention it again. You're a good friend too, Carlisle, and I will be telling him not to hurt you either – just so you know."

I smile at him, assuring him that I'm not mad. "Thanks Jasper, we're lucky to have you guys as friends."

We both turned our attention back to the dancefloor, and I spotted a few guys with their eyes on you. "Do you think Alice will mind if I cut in?"

He laughed, knowing exactly what I had seen, "I'm sure she won't. Go and mark your territory, caveman."

I rolled my eyes, but stood up, undeterred by his teasing. I grabbed us some more drinks from the bar and motioned you over to me. You gulped yours down, as if there wasn't any alcohol in it at all, and Alice took the couple I had got for her and Jasper, before heading back to the table.

"We need a dance before the end of the night, Carlisle." I nodded to acknowledge her statement, but my attention was all on you, as my hands toyed at your waistline,

"You've got some admirers, baby."

You looked at me like I was crazy, and I nodded, "You have, I swear. Jasper said I looked like a caveman when I saw them."

Your hands ran up my chest, pausing to undo another button on my shirt, before locking around my neck, "A caveman? How were you a caveman?"

I quickly finished my drink, giving you a quick kiss and leaving the empty glass on the bar, before moving us out to the dancefloor, trying to keep us slightly out of Jasper and Alice's sight line.

"I don't know baby, the fact I wanted to come down here and show everyone that you were mine must have shown on my face."

You groaned, and pressed against me, your cock pressing against mine. "How would you have shown them?"

I grinned, knowing I had just found another of your turn-ons.

I kept our hips moving against each other, your arms were over my shoulder as my hands rested on your waist. "Well this is a good start, baby. But do you want to know what I would love to do with you?"

You nodded, and I span you round, so you could see out into the sea of people. My hands were on your hips, you pushed back into me and I groaned into your neck as your ass moved teasingly against me. We started moving together, dancing, and I dipped my lips down to your ear.

"Well firstly I'd get this shirt off." I slipped my hands under your shirt, and the t-shirt you were wearing under it. My lips were teasing your neck as my hands moved up your chest, exposing a small bit of your stomach, "Is this ok, baby? I won't actually take it off."

A groan was all I got from you, but your hips never wavered and my hand carried on until I brushed across one of your nipples. Your hips bucked and I knew you needed some more words. "Maybe I would get down on my knees for you here. Do you think that would show everyone that you're mine?" I glanced around and saw a few guys looking at us. Your head was resting on my shoulder, your eyes shut, unaware of the audience you were acquiring, again.

Much as I enjoyed fuelling the fantasy for you, I felt a flare of possessiveness when I saw the hungry eyes on you, and I turned you back round to face me.

You started at the sudden movement, but I didn't give you a chance to think before my lips were on yours. My hand found its way to yours, my fingers toying with the ring on your finger. I pulled back from you, slightly breathless, "You're mine, baby. Mine."

As you nodded and rested your head on my shoulder, teasing kisses at my neck, I looked around again, glad to see the guys who were so taken with you had moved on. Jasper and Alice were heading our way, so I stepped back a couple of inches to make the distance between us more respectable. You hadn't realised what was going on, though, and followed me.

"We'll carry this on later," I assured you as your eyes met mine, confused.

Alice called our name, and we broke out of the bubble we had created for ourselves. As we looked up, she snapped a picture of us, checking it back immediately. "You look so cute, you can use this as an engagement picture!"

She showed it to us, and I laughed. "I'm not sure a photo of our groins pressed together is what people want to see, Alice."

"You'd be surprised." Alice smiled. I wasn't sure what that was about, and wasn't sure I wanted to know.

I looked at you, expecting – and finding – the blush that colored your cheeks. "We could send it to Emmett, give him a nice surprise."

You laughed, stepping back from me to allow Jasper and Alice to dance with us. As they did, I took the time to really watch you. You were so relaxed, so happy in the moment, and so gorgeous. I took hold of your hand, needing some sort of connection with you, and you squeezed it, never breaking off from the giggles you had erupted in due to something Jasper had said. I looked to Alice, who was quietly snapping pictures of us, and shot her a smile.

"Stop looking at the camera, you're ruining my candids!"

Rolling my eyes at her, I turned back to the conversation, trying to keep up with what was going on. I had no idea what you were talking about – it was something to do with the store. I watched the story unfold, you were becoming more and more animated in your telling, and eventually – with an apologetic squeeze of mine – you took your hand back to aid your tale.

Alice pulled me over to the bar to get another round of drinks, and we both turned our back to the bar as we waited, watching our boys laughing and dancing. I saw movement in my peripheral vision, and turned to catch Alice lowering her camera.

"I'm only stood at the bar, it can't be that interesting."

"I was capturing the emotion, not the scene. You'll see."

~-FOF-~

We decided to tell my family over Skype rather than a phone call. I suggested an email but the look of horror on your face when we thought about my mum's reaction to that put paid to that idea.

The reaction we got was pretty much exactly what we thought it would be. My mum cried – a lot, my dad said he was pleased for us, and Emmett asked if we needed a website for a recommendation of a nudist beach for our honeymoon.

They were all happy for us, though, and we started to throw out some dates to see what would be workable for them to come over. We had decided on a small wedding, just us, and close family and a few friends. My family all lived in the UK, and they wouldn't all be able to make it over anyway, and I didn't want the loss of your parents to be even more acute to you, so the small wedding made sense.

Emmett had booked to visit in the Easter school holidays, but 2 months time was a little short notice for us. The next big holiday for him was the summer vacation. July was out for me, as the new interns started at the hospital in July, so I needed to be there to supervise. We decided we would try and work to the end of summer. We all had jobs that we would need to arrange the time off with, so plans were tentative. After we shut down the call, though, we curled up on the sofa, and started to talk. All of a sudden, you sat up and turned to face me.

"We could be married by September. That's 7 months away. Holy shit."

I laughed at your expression, "I hope you mean 'holy shit' in a good way, baby."

"Yeah, of course I do. It's just quick is all. Not a bad thing. I can't wait to introduce you as my husband."

Your words made my heart rate pick up. The knowledge that you were excited to be married to me made me feel incredible. You leant towards me, pressing a sweet kiss to my lips, before throwing one of your legs over mine, and sitting astride me. My hands immediately worked their way down your back to rest on your ass, but you buried your head in my neck before I could start anything.

Your breathing had picked up slightly, and I knew this wasn't about sex, this was about you needing to be close, needing to feel secure. I moved my hands up a little, to rest on your lower back. "What's up, baby?"

You sat up, avoiding my gaze a little. "What are we going to do about names?"

"Names?"

"Yeah, after the wedding. Are we going to have the same surname?"

I'm sure the confusion was written on my face, "I assumed so, yeah. Don't you want to do that?"

You shrugged, your eyes were clouding with emotions I couldn't even being to diagnose. "I do, but I don't want to lose my name."

Your head was back on my shoulder, avoiding my eyes. "It doesn't mean I don't love you. I do. But I'm the last Masen. And I don't want to lose that."

I finally understood what you meant, and why I needed to explain my thinking to you more clearly. "Baby, I thought we could hyphenate. Or if you don't want to, I'll take your name. I don't mind. I get your reasoning, and if we apply it to me, well, I think it's pretty obvious that Em is straight. So Cullen can carry on through him."

As you lifted your head and your eyes met mine, I gave you a reassuring smile. "Are you sure? I feel like this is a big deal, and I'm forcing your hand."

One of my hands moved up to play with your hair, bringing your head closer to mine. "It is a big deal, of course it is. But I was never going to _make _you take Cullen as your name. I always figured we would hyphenate, to be honest."

You nodded, "I didn't even think of that. I was thinking it was one or the other. Hyphenation is good, though. So how do we decide which way round? Masen-Cullen or Cullen- Masen?"

I tried to ignore the pleasant shiver that went through me at those names. I knew which one you really wanted, and I was happy with it. "Masen-Cullen."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Edward Masen-Cullen and Carlisle Masen-Cullen. They both sound good. That's where my vote lies, anyway. What about you?"

You smiled, "I don't mind either. But I like Masen-Cullen."

"That's sorted then, baby. We should make a list of everything we will need switching to a different name." Your lips were nipping at my neck, your hands making their way to the belt of my jeans. "It can wait 'til tomorrow, though."

~-FOF-~

We couldn't sort the wedding for summer, in the end. My work were wary of me having so much time off when the interns were under 2 months in, and then my dad couldn't get time off from his job for almost exactly the same reason.

After some thinking, we decided to aim for the end of October. Schools in England were off for a week, so Em could come over, and it was close to our anniversary, so we would be on honeymoon to celebrate 4 years together.

My parents flew out the weekend before the wedding, my mum was desperate to help with the plans, although there weren't many. I think she was just feeling a little out of everything. We were both still working up until the middle of the week, so they spent the first few days recovering from jet lag and exploring the city.

Work felt like it dragged, and I was glad when Wednesday night arrived and I was finally off for a few weeks. My work colleagues had clubbed together to get us a card and some vouchers for The Home Depot, "for when you guys move to your house with the white picket fence." We also had a celebratory lunch, which never really works out when everyone is on shift, but I got an extended lunch break to chat to the people who popped in to say hi.

I would see a few of them the next night for a sort of bachelor party, and again at the wedding, but I was touched by the thought. I still sometimes felt like a foreigner at work, even after 5 years I would sometimes fall back into doing things the way I was taught in England. But seeing how happy everyone was for us was amazing.

The night out was crazy. There was such a mix of people there, including my dad and Emmett, and a variety of people from the hospital. You were there with Jasper and a few other people from the store, and a few people you were still in touch with from high school. My mum and Rose were spending the evening together with Alice.

We went for a meal first, at a Tapas bar, so that we could cater for as many tastes as possible. It went well. We were sat next to each other, flanked by Jasper and Emmett, and although, initially you had been quite overwhelmed by the number of people, you soon relaxed and were laughing and joking along with them.

My dad and a few others headed home after the meal while we went on to a few bars. We ended up separated for most of the night, trying to be sociable when all we really wanted to do was lose ourselves in each other.

We crawled into bed at about 3am, knowing it was our last night together before we were married, as everyone was insisting we separated for the night the next day.

"Did you have a good night?"

I waited for a second but got no reply. Your head was resting on my chest, and your eyes were shut already – you were completely exhausted.

Rolling you back gently onto your side of the bed, I wrapped myself around you, unable to get as close as I felt I needed to. My mind was racing, overwhelmed by everything that we had to deal with in the next couple of days.

I lay there for an hour before I finally fell asleep, just enjoying the feel of you in my arms.

I woke up to see you awake, your hand running along my arm.

"Sorry I fell asleep so quickly last night. I was more tired than I thought."

"It's ok baby, it's been an exhausting week. And it isn't over yet. It's a good job you're worth it." I rolled over to look at the clock, but your hand gripped my arm to stop me.

"Just a couple of minutes before we get up, this is the only time we will be alone until tomorrow night." You pushed me onto my back, and lay over me, placing soft kisses on my lips and jaw.

"I love you, Carlisle. I can't wait for tomorrow. I can't believe we're going to get married."

I grinned, thinking about it was a source of such joy to me, and with you I knew I didn't have to rein it in.

A knock at the door cut off any reply I was going to make, as your head dropped down to my shoulder in frustration.

"Well, you'd better believe it, because I'm pretty sure we're about to be thrown, head first, into the craziness of the day before our wedding day."

I was right.

The day was full of making sure plans were confirmed, that everyone knew what they were doing, that everyone had the right outfits in the right houses.

We had an early meal out with my parents before we dropped you off at Jasper's house for the night.

We got a few precious minutes alone to say goodbye until the next day, in their guest room. Your suit was hanging up in the closet, and Alice had taken one of our photos from our apartment and put it next to the bed for you.

"I don't want to stay here. This is a stupid tradition." You were in my arms, we were holding each other so tightly. Neither of us wanted to let go.

"I know, I wish we were staying together."

"Why are we doing this?"

I laughed, "Getting married?"

That got a smile out of you, "No, separating for the night."

I drew in a deep breath, trying to control the emotions that were threatening to bubble up out of me. "It's tradition? Alice and my mum insisted? I don't know, baby, but we will be together again soon. And when we are, we'll be married within the hour. Just hold onto that."

I pressed my lips to yours, "I love you Edward, and I will see you soon."

"I love you too. See you tomorrow. Don't forget your suit, you know I love you all dressed up."

We didn't quite manage the separation for the whole night. My parents and Em were staying at our apartment for the night and they were driving me crazy.

My phone had been taken off me for the night by Em, so I couldn't contact you, and after a couple of hours I was completely fed up. My mum and dad were in their room. I knew where Em had hidden my phone so I grabbed it while he was on his, talking to Rosalie, and headed towards the door

"It's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding."

I spun round to see Emmett leaning against the kitchen counter, grinning at me.

"Keep your voice down, will you?" I glanced at the door of the guest room, praying no one had heard us. "I'm pretty sure Edward isn't a bride, so I think we'll be ok. A wedding dress would never suit him."

A smirk appeared on Emmett's face.

"Whatever you are thinking, stop it. And let me leave, or I'll tell Rosalie about the time you left that girl alone in a restaurant because you couldn't pay the bill." Any threat that involved letting Rosalie know he was less than perfect usually worked to get him to bend to our will.

"I was 17!"

I shrugged. "She doesn't need to know that."

Grabbing the door handle, I turned back round to him. "I need to see Edward, I need to get away from mum's crazy planning for a few hours, and I need to remind us why we're doing this. Because right now it feels like a whole lot of hassle, during which I'm not even allowed to see the man I love. I'll be back in a couple of hours, I need to get some sleep."

"Yeah you do. You don't want to be too tired tomorrow night!"

I shot him an unimpressed look and opened the door, more than ready to leave, but he spoke up again.

"If mum asks, I'll tell her you've gone out to write your speech in peace. Say hi to Eddie for me, I miss him being around here."

I nodded. "Thanks Em. See, sometimes you can be a nice little brother."

I was out of the door before I could hear his reply, desperate to see you.

Your cell phone was off, so I pleaded with Jasper to let you escape. He agreed, and I met you at the front of their house.

We drove down to the waterfront, sitting on a bench, my arm around your shoulders and chatting quietly about anything and everything. Alice had been driving you crazy, too, and it was so good to get back to just us.

As I dropped you off, I felt a lot lighter than I had earlier in the evening. I knew there wasn't long to go before we were finally married, and I couldn't wait.

~-FOF-~

I'm not sure I have ever been as happy as I was when I first laid eyes on you on our wedding day.

You were there before us, as Alice wanted to double check a few details, so although we had decided neither of us would be walking down the aisle, I kind of got to, as you were at the top of the aisle, chatting to Jasper.

The sight of you took my breath away, you looked so handsome in your suit. At first, you didn't notice me there, so I took a few seconds to look at you, before you spotted me.

Your blush appeared as you saw how I was looking at you, before your eyes raked down my body, too. By that point, though, I was halfway to you, and before I knew it you were in my arms.

"You're here! We're getting married!" The joy in your voice was uncontained, and I saw my mum turn to hug my dad, the emotions getting to her.

"Yeah we are, let's do this thing."

My mum sat next to you, as the Justice of the Peace said his bit before we got on with the important stuff. There were a few people there, the room wasn't packed, but we hadn't invited too many. I recognised a few people from the hospital, and a few from our bachelor party, and there were some unfamiliar people there too. No one else was important to me, though, except you.

I took your hand as we stepped up to recite our vows. We kept them traditional, neither of us wanting to write our own – a good decision based on how much stress writing our speeches caused us.

I couldn't have kept the smile off my face even if I'd wanted to, as I heard your quiet voice repeat the vows – agreeing to be mine forever. You had tears in your eyes, and a few spilled over by the end, setting me off, too.

We both started giggling at the mess we had become, and it took a minute for us to calm down enough for me to say my vows.

I stumbled through them, keen to get on with the ceremony. My voice wavered a couple of times, as I looked into your eyes and saw the depth of the love there. Your hand squeezed mine, in one of your favourite silent gestures of support.

Both our hands were shaking as we put the rings on each other's fingers, and I knew we could both hear my mum crying quietly behind us. I rolled my eyes at you, to try and lighten the atmosphere that was so heavy with emotions. You grinned at me, and we finally were able to be pronounced married, and I finally, _finally_, got to kiss you.

I don't think I let go of your hand for hours. People congratulated us, and once we had made it through everyone, we went out for our third meal out in 3 days. There were only a few of us there, family and a few close friends. But more than enough people for us to be nervous about doing a speech in front of them.

We did our speeches first, wanting to get them out of the way. Both were short and to the point, but nothing less than completely from the heart. We agreed that we would thank different people, to try and make sure we covered all our bases, and then say a little about each other.

You went first, your speech was short, but it said everything it needed to say. My mum was already an emotional ruin, but after you admitted that you were pleased to marry into our family, not only because you loved me, but because you had come to think of my family as yours too, she was outright sobbing.

I loved your speech, but I had to ask you for a copy of it again later, because I was so nervous about mine that a lot of it didn't register, and that wasn't acceptable to me.

Before I knew it, it was time for me to get up. I got through the thank yous quickly and then moved onto the more personal section of the speech.

"When I moved out here, I had no idea of where my life would go. I thought maybe I'd spend a year here and see how it went. And then I met Edward. I am so lucky to have found someone who loves me so completely, and who I love just as much. He's a beautiful person, inside and out. I'm not sure what I have done to deserve him, but I know I never want to let him go. There have been so many moments in the last few years where I have thought that I couldn't possibly be any happier than I am at that moment, and yet, when I'm with Edward we just keep having them. I thought the day that he agreed to be my husband was the best day of my life. Today, by going through with it, he has beaten it. Again."

I had avoided looking at you throughout most of the speech, knowing that a certain look in your eyes would make it almost impossible for me to continue. I had to for the next part of the speech, though, and as I looked at you, your eyes glistening and my mum holding your hand, I knew I had to speed up before I lost it. Again.

"So Edward, I guess you have a lot to live up to if we're going to beat today." I smiled at you, "I'm pretty sure we will manage it. Every day with you is amazing, I won't ever take anything for granted. We've been saying for months that we can't wait for this day, well, now I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you as my husband. I love you, Edward, thank you for making me the happiest I have ever been."

As I sat down, I let out a breath, pleased that I had got through it without messing up. They were such important words and I wanted everyone to know how I felt about you.

Some other people said a few words, Emmett was toned down noticeably for his usual standards, I assumed that was due to Rosalie and my parents being there. My dad welcomed you to our family, officially, and I think that meant more to you than you ever let on.

The meal went on well into the evening, and much as I was enjoying being with our friends and family, I was desperate to get you back to the hotel we had booked for the night.

Our taxi arrived about 9pm, and we said a quick goodbye before I bundled you in. Emmett's filter had clearly broken again as he was shouting out some choice comments. I ignored him, though, happy to get you near enough alone for the first time in nearly 24 hours.

We tried to keep everything PG-13 in the car, but it was difficult, especially with you in that suit.

However, once we were in the elevator in the hotel, all bets were off. I had asked Emmett to check us in earlier in the day, and take our bags up, so we had nothing to worry about apart from getting to the room.

I had booked us the honeymoon suite for the night, but neither of us were concentrating on the surroundings.

I backed you up to the bed, pushing your jacket off your shoulders and shrugging my own off. My hands ran up your sides and over your shoulders to your tie. I undid it enough to slip it over your head, as you did the same for mine. As soon as your tie was off I was working on your shirt, unwilling to stop until you were completely naked for me. You kicked your shoes off and went to undo your pants, but I stopped you, wanting to do all that myself.

Kneeling down, I pulled your pants off your legs, and kissed my way back up, slowly. You were sitting on the bed, and I kissed you, gently pushing you to lie back as I hovered over you. I kicked off my own pants and then we were on the bed together, in only our boxers. I was lying over you, pushing every inch of my skin against yours, desperate for the contact.

I could feel how hard you were against me, and I couldn't help but grind down against you as I kissed you. I rested my forehead against yours, waiting until you opened your eyes to look at me before I whispered "I love you, Edward Masen- Cullen."

The smile on your face at the sound of your new name was amazing, and you pushed up against me, wrapping your legs around mine, before whispering back to me, "I love you, too. We're married. Finally married. You're all mine now, Carlisle Masen- Cullen."

"There's no one else I would rather belong to."

I moved off you to the side, and we kissed slowly, some of the urgency from earlier gone with our words. We needed to show each other how much we loved that we were now married, and we did it through teasing hands and wandering kisses. We knew each other so well now we could drive each other crazy through the simplest of touches. And we did.

We spent so long just getting each other ready, mentally and physically. Although we had been together so many times before, this felt so different. We both knew that the dynamic of our relationship had changed, and the reverence with which we treated each other was in deference to our new roles, how we were now joined in every way we possibly could be.

Finally, I lay over you, ready to push into you, to finally join us completely as a married couple. Your eyes were bright, you were so relaxed and happy, and yet my heart felt like it was going to hammer out of my chest.

"I love you so much, baby. So much."

You nodded, wriggling slightly underneath me.

I laughed, "Ok I get the message, 'Shut up and get on with it'"

"I would put it slightly more lovingly than that, but essentially, yes. I need you. I need this. I need us together."

Your words made me inhale sharply, and I gave you exactly what you needed. Being inside you is the best feeling in the world, and on that night, when I felt like the emotions of the day and the love that I felt for you was about to overpower me, you knew exactly what I needed to keep me grounded.

I tried to set a slow pace, wanting to make sure you knew that this was all about how much I loved you. You were having none of it though, wrapping your legs around my back and using them as leverage against me, to make me go faster and harder.

"Jesus, baby, you're killing me."

"I know you love me, I know that's what you're trying to show me, but I need us to be us. We can still be in love while you go harder, Carlisle."

I totally lost my rhythm at your words, and started laughing, burying my head in your neck. Most of my weight was on you, so you couldn't even move against me now, although it didn't stop you trying.

"Ok, I get it, I will move a bit faster. But I want it noted that I tried to do the slow romantic thing!"

I think you would have agreed to anything at that point as long as it moved me, "Yes, it's noted and appreciated, honestly. But seriously, get moving."

I dropped a kiss into your neck as I started moving at a rhythm you were happier with. I loved that you were so confident in us now that you were happy to dictate what you needed, even if it was obvious I was trying to do something different. When I thought about how much you had changed and grown since we first met, it was almost unbelievable that you were the same man.

I had you writhing underneath me in no time, and I knew I wouldn't last. My arms were shaking from the effort of keeping myself up over you, so I told you to touch yourself, knowing I wouldn't hold out on one arm. I wanted us to come at the same time, and I was so grateful when I felt you tense up, knowing all your warning signs and knowing I could let go.

"Oh god, I love you." I dropped down to kiss you, wanting as much of our bodies touching as possible as we came together.

We stayed like that for quite a while, catching our breath and whispering to each other. When we moved, it was to go and shower together, neither of us willing to part long enough to take them separately.

As we climbed back into bed, exhausted mentally, physically, and emotionally, I lay my arm over your body, entwining our fingers and feeling your wedding ring against mine. I smiled, kissing the back of your neck. "Goodnight, Edward Masen- Cullen."

I got no response, you were already asleep. I wasn't far behind.


	10. Chapter 10

_**Thank you all for the alerts/favourites/reviews. I dont have words up here, there will be some at the bottom.  
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_____**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. If I did, the trailer would have way more Carlisle/Edward in.**_

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As you had only ever been out of the country to visit England in winter, we decided to find somewhere hot for our honeymoon. We ended up in the Bahamas.

It was lovely, waking up to you every day in our cabin which was right next to the beach. We spent mornings and evenings outside, exploring while it wasn't too warm to function, and the middle of the days were usually spent back at the cabin, in the air conditioned bedroom, creating our own heat that we could both cope with.

One morning, we were lying on the beach, listening to the sound of the waves and enjoying the peace that they brought when you piped up with a question.

"What next?"

I turned to look at you, cursing the glare of the sun that prevented me from being able to see the look on your face properly. "How do you mean?"

"Well, we've got married now, so what's the next big thing?"

"Our first anniversary?"

You hit my shoulder, "No, I mean in life. What do we do now?"

I laughed, knowing your constant need for goals, I shouldn't have been surprised by your question. "I don't know, baby. Can we wait until we're off honeymoon to think about this stuff?"

"Yeah, I guess so. I was just wondering."

I leant up on my elbow, my hand tracing your chest. "Baby, we just need to enjoy being married for a while, yeah?"

Your eyes were now fixed on my hand, "And how do you suggest we do that?"

I grinned, leaning down to kiss you, "I can think of a few ways."

A gust of wind blew just at the wrong moment, and I pulled back from initiating a sand-filled kiss. "But maybe I'll show you inside."

~-FOF-~

Before we knew it, we had been back in the daily grind for months. I had been thrown back into work as the busy month around Christmas time happened. I was working long weeks, as were you – as you were trying to compensate for all the kids who had missed their music lessons while we were away.

We made time for each other, though, still very much in the honeymoon spirit, and tiredness didn't even register as I walked into work every day with a spring in my step.

Emmett visited whenever he could, his relationship with Rosalie was getting serious. She had been to England to visit him at my parents' house, and seemed to have had a good time. I wasn't surprised, she got on so well with my mum when they were over for the wedding. I was sure it wouldn't be long until there was another wedding on the horizon, although they had to decide which country they wanted to live in, before any other big decisions were made. Knowing Emmett as I do though, I was fairly certain he would be moving over. My mum would be distraught that we had both moved so far away, and I'm sure she would badger my dad until they moved over as well. I missed my family, and the thought of it all coming together so neatly was amazing.

You hadn't mentioned anything again about needing a plan for our lives, and, this time, it was me who began to get a bit restless.

"I'm not saying we need to do this tomorrow, or even in the next few years, but what do you think about us having kids?"

My question was completely out of the blue one morning, and although we had talked about having kids before, it was always in a very hypothetical manner. But it had been on my mind a lot, and I had to talk about it with you in a way that was more based in reality. I probably could have chosen a better time to bring it up, though, as I had to wait a few minutes for you to recover from inhaling your breakfast cereal before I finally got a reply.

"Where did that come from?" Your voice was still rough from coughing, and I handed you my drink as you had finished yours, taking hold of your other hand.

"I don't know really. It's just something I've been thinking about a lot recently. And obviously I don't want to get carried away with this stuff without knowing where you are at, too. So we can get wherever we're going together."

You nodded, and took a few moments to figure out whatever you were thinking. "I guess... I don't think I want kids right now. We've only been married for a year, and I'm kind of enjoying having you all to myself. But maybe in the next few years, yeah. And I guess it would take so long to sort out, we could start researching and stuff as soon as we want."

I was unable to stop the smile on my face, so happy at the prospect of having kids with you. "We would need a bigger place, for starters. And we need to figure out how we are going to do this, like if we'd want to adopt or do some sort of surrogacy. So yeah, it'll take a while for it all to come together." I squeezed your hand, and pulled it up to my lips. "Thank you for not freaking out, baby. And thank you for being honest." The shy boy I first met would have agreed to whatever I wanted, and every time you stood up for yourself and told me what you wanted, made me smile.

~-FOF-~

We spent the next few months dipping in and out of research, both for places to live and for how to go about becoming parents. Although buying a new place was our priority, we came to a decision about how to have kids a lot faster. Both of us would have loved to have a child with a genetic link to at least one of us, but the cost was crazy, well beyond what we could afford. And so we decided to go with adoption, when the time was right.

With that decision made, we looked for a house with renewed effort. Although we hadn't decided on a timescale, we knew that once we had moved we would feel a lot more comfortable when the time came to start the adoption process, living somewhere we were settled.

Our apartment was fairly central to both of our workplaces, and although neither of us wanted to give up the proximity, it wasn't a possibility if we wanted a house. We house hunted for months, visiting towns we thought we would like to live in, arguing over the tiny details, looking at local schools and what they were like, where the nearest stores were – we spent hours searching for houses that were near enough to a pharmacy that we could run out if the kids needed anything. That was on me. I also wanted to be near enough to the hospital for it to not be a huge journey if anything happened to anyone. You wanted to be near parks and open spaces so we could walk outside somewhere that we could let kids run round, and not worry about them being near roads. You were keen to look at sports clubs that were around the areas too, wanting to get them active and into sport as soon as possible.

We were way ahead of ourselves, but we didn't see ourselves moving again once we bought the house, and so the months we spent looking were worth it when we finally found a house we both liked, in an area we were happy with.

The timing sucked, but we could live with spending our second wedding anniversary moving house, rather than doing something romantic. We had help, though. Emmett had finally proposed to Rosalie and had moved over here during the summer break. He had found a job at a junior high school and was living quite near our old apartment, with Rosalie. We enlisted his help, and he and Jasper came down early, before work, and helped us with the big stuff. Everyone came down after work, and we got a fair amount of things set up.

Emmett had noticed something, and as we sat around eating takeout, he had to ask.

"Why aren't you putting anything in one of the bedrooms? Is it going to be a sexual fetish room or something?"

The house had four bedrooms, one for us, a guest room, we were planning on turning one into a music/study, and the last one we would want to turn into a nursery. It didn't feel right putting anything else in there, and so we directed anything that didn't immediately have somewhere to go into the spare room. No one went into the other bedroom.

We weren't going to tell anyone about our adoption plans as it was still some way off yet, and so I just shook my head "We don't want to clutter up a room with stuff. It'll just sit there and get in the way when we finally want to do something with the room."

It wasn't a total lie.

I watched everyone's reactions carefully, as you kept your head down, quietly chewing your pizza. Alice and Rosalie shot each other a look, and I knew that they probably had a good idea what we were up to. Emmett and Jasper seemed to be too busy eating and watching the football to care about my response.

You snuggled under my arm, obviously thinking about the true purpose of the room, and needing to be close to me. That was more than fine by me. I rubbed my hand over your upper arm, dropping a kiss on your head. It had taken so long, but it was an incredible feeling to be in our new house, with our friends around us. There was a slight atmosphere of excitement between us with the way the conversation had gone, too. Having kids was something that for the last year had been shelved until we were in a new house. Now that we were there, we both knew it was a discussion we would be having again soon. And I had a feeling I knew how it would go.

~-FOF-~

In actual fact, we didn't talk about it again until the new year. Our work shifts seemed to fall horribly for a few months, we seemed to be on opposite work schedules completely. And any time we spent together at the house, we were generally still sorting stuff out. It was hell, and I was ready to quit and set up a private practice by Christmas, sick of not seeing my husband. You talked me down from the ledge, though. You had spoken to Jasper about it, and sorted your shifts between you so that we would have at least one day a week together.

Life had calmed down by January, and we chatted quietly as we lay on the sofa one evening. Our decisions about how to go about having kids were made, and it was just a matter of timing. We decided to start researching the process properly, and start whenever we felt we were informed enough.

It took quite a while to find an agency that we felt was right. There was so much information out there, it was hard to know where to begin. We read agency website, forums, reviews, adoption advice sites – anything we could think of to help us make the decision.

We finally chose one, and sent our details in. That night, as we curled up in bed together, your nerves showed themselves.

"What if no one wants us?"

You were lying so close to me, I could feel your pulse racing as I rolled onto my back, encouraging you to lie over me.

"Someone will. It might just take a while. People might not want a gay couple adopting their kid, so it might take longer for us. And if this agency doesn't work for us then we will find another one. Or we'll go a different route. It's fine. Someone as amazing as you deserves to be a dad, a kid out there will be lucky to have you, and we will get there, somehow."

Your head was buried in my neck, and you murmured, "You'll be a good dad."

I smiled. "I hope so. Don't worry about being chosen quickly, half those sites we went to said it took ages. So we will have to just enjoy having a house without little ears for a little longer, while we can."

~-FOF-~

All my reassurances were for nothing, we had been chosen after less than 6 months by a young mum who was pregnant with twins.

The day we met Leah, we were both terrified. She was amazing, though, for someone only just in her twenties. She knew she didn't have the means to take care of the babies – she was on her own – and wanted them to have a better life than she could give them.

She had read our file and credentials, happy that we were both successful in the fields we had chosen. She wanted to know how we would raise the children, what sort of schools we would send them too, if we would put them in any activities. I grinned as we told her about what was near our house, suddenly so happy we had both been so picky about where we chose.

"You both have long working hours, how will you get to spend much time with them?"

It was a valid question. And one we had already thought about. You had confided our plan to Jasper, and he promised he would do everything he could to help us out, sorting your shifts so one of us could be with the babies at all times. He and Alice had been trying for a baby for a while, we all knew that, and he said she would be a willing babysitter if we needed it. Em and Rose would step up, too. I knew they would. And I could always afford to drop my hours at work slightly, we were well enough off to be able to do that.

We explained that we had good family support, and that we were in the middle of sorting out our workdays so we would be able to look after the kids when they arrived. Leah seemed happy with our answer, knowing all the changes we were putting in place to give the babies the best life we could.

Although she wanted to meet us, she wanted a closed adoption, which meant she would have no contact with the babies once they were ours. We assured her if she changed her mind about that then we would do everything we could to help her see them.

Although the meeting had gone well, we were nervous up until the moment we got confirmation that Leah wanted us to adopt her children. You had taken the phone call, I was in work, and you had rushed in to see me. You had paced a groove into the waiting room floor as you waited for me to be done with the patient I was with.

As soon as I saw you, and the smile on your face, I knew the news. I had only seen you smile that much on a few occasions, all amazing ones, and this was no different. I dragged you into an on call room so we could talk in private, and maybe do a little celebrating while we were there. I was called before we could, though. But we got 5 minutes to hug and kiss, both of us utterly speechless.

The babies were due in January, but I explained to you that twins usually came a little early. Se we were looking at December.

"Emmett and Rose will kill us."

Their wedding day was in December, soon after the school holidays started.

"It's one day, baby. So we might have to keep our cell phones on just in case, but I'm sure we'll be ok."

You nodded. "You can tell Rose and Em, then. If you're so confident we won't hijack their day."

I shook my head. "We'll tell them together. They won't mind. They can get married in the hospital chapel if all else fails. It'll be fine."

~-FOF-~

"Maybe we should do something for the babies."

I had known you weren't concentrating on the movie we were watching for quite a while now, and I had wondered what was on your mind.

I hadn't expected what you said, though, and I was confused by your comment.

"How do you mean? We've bought all the stuff for the nursery, I think we have enough clothes for four babies, not two, and you've done that beautiful mural on the wall. I can't think of anything else there is to do."

You had worked so hard on that mural, I didn't even know you were artistic in that way, but you spent hours holed up in there, refusing to let me see until it was done. And it was worth the wait.

The entire room had been painted, an outdoor scene that covered hills with animals, round to a skyline view, the view from our old apartment of the city you grew up in, through to a view of London. Various photographs littered the walls, too. Some of our London pictures were at the appropriate points in the mural, and you had painted the waterfront and put a picture of us there, too.

I looked at the wall with the animals on, pretty sure I recognised a few from some kids movies, but it was bare of photographs. When I asked you why, you said you were saving the space so we could take the kids to the safari park, and put pictures of us all up there.

You had gone to so much effort, and it looked amazing. So I had no idea what you meant when you said there was more we could do.

"I was thinking we could make a book for them, with photos in and stuff. Show them our lives before they came along. I know we have photos up around the house and stuff, but we could write a little bit too. Like we could write about London and what we saw there. Things like that."

An image of us sitting on the couch with toddlers, showing them these books and talking about our memories, popped into my head and made me smile. "I think that's a great idea, baby. We could start it off with stuff about our family, too? We could put pictures of our parents in, and write about what they're like. If you want?"

You hesitated, snuggling into me a little, clearly thinking about what memories you could include in there about your parents. "That's a nice idea. I sometimes wonder what I could tell them about my parents, and how I would even start the conversation, so maybe this would be a good way to bring it up with them."

We sat in silence for a while, both lost in memories, and then you started to laugh, "We're going to have a hard job thinking of something we can write in there about Emmett that's kid friendly!"

~-FOF-~

Spare moments were sparse, as we were helping Emmett and Rosalie get ready for their wedding, move into their new house, as well as working as many hours as we could so that we could take some time off when the babies arrived.

Every spare moment we got, though, was spent on the scrapbooks for the babies. We started with a little bit about each of our families – you wrote a lovely piece about your parents, and the kind of people they were. I wrote a little about my parents, and what growing up was like for me. "Uncle Emmett" had a page to himself, highly edited, but it still captured who he was. He insisted on us taking a new photo of him for it, and he made himself a – frankly hideous – shirt which was made up of sports shirts of teams he supported, cut up and put back together, "So that the kids know what is important in Uncle Em's life!" He couldn't sow, but refused to let anyone help him, so the inside of this shirt was covered in tape, holding everything together. It looked awful, but it summed Emmett up perfectly, so we put the photograph in. And we told Em that if it ever scared the kids, he owed us some babysitting hours.

Everyone chipped into the scrapbooks, giving us photographs, or reminding us of occasions we had forgotten. Jasper gave us a beautiful montage of lines from "thank you" letters you had received from kids you had taught piano to. We had each written a little about the jobs we did, and why we enjoyed them so much, and how we had come to do them. It was so good to see you writing positively about the choices you made all those years ago, knowing how difficult they were for you to make at the time.

We did one for each baby, although they contained exactly the same material for now. We wanted to continue writing in the books after they were born, the kids would hit milestones at different times, and we wanted them to know we looked at them as individuals. They looked incredible when they were done, and as we put them in the nursery, ready for when the babies arrived, the room just felt complete.

~-FOF-~

As the day of Emmett and Rose's wedding arrived, everyone was excitable. They had moved the wedding venue to a place a few hours drive away from where we lived, so that we were closer to where Leah was – just in case she went into labour. She had asked that we be there, if possible, as she had no one. We said yes, immediately.

My mum and dad had spent a few days at our house – spending their days looking at houses. I think they were pretty much set on moving out here. My dad was still working, so if he could find a job out here, I think they would have just had their belongings sent over on the next flight and stayed.

We booked out the hotel for the wedding, and the wedding rehearsal was hilarious. Spending time with everyone who was so excited for our family was amazing. Jasper and Rosalie's parents were there, and they got on so well with my mum and dad. We sat at the table, chatting quietly about what the next few weeks would be like, when my phone went off.

It was a text from Leah, letting us know she was having mild contractions. Everyone had heard my phone go off, everyone knew what was going on. She had rung the hospital and they said not to go in, and it would probably be a long time before she was in active labor. So we decided to head to bed and sleep while we could. The wedding was early, at 11am, and it was a 2 hour drive to the hospital. Everyone would understand if we had to leave, but I hoped it wouldn't come to that, I didn't want to miss my baby brother getting married if I could help it.

We were woken by a banging on the door at 6am. It was Emmett.

"They've moved the wedding to earlier for us. You've got 3 hours to get ready. Then we can get married. And then go."

I was completely dazed, and pulled him into a hug, "Thanks Em. And thank Rosalie, too."

"Will do. Couldn't not have the best man at my wedding!"

~-FOF-~

_We walk through the door and see Alice holding Leah's hand. My eyes scan the monitors, reading all the information I can. Your hand is gripping mine so tightly I'm sure I won't be able to feel my fingers later. Leah grimaces in pain and I immediately feel like an asshole._

"_Sorry we're late."_

_Leah rolls her eyes at us, "I heard today was a busy day for you. And you're not late. You're just in time."_

_Alice moves out of the room, giving Leah a brief hug. They only met an hour or so ago, Alice volunteering to go and sit with her as I was in no fit state while you weren't here._

_Your eyes are wide, I forgot that you won't have seen anything like this before except on TV. I nudge you round to the other side of the bed."Go hold that hand. I'll take this one."_

_You bend down to give Leah a hug, your eyes are full of tears already, and you're unable to get your words out._

"_I think he wants to say 'Thank you.' As do I."_

"_I haven't done anything yet."_

_I roll my eyes right back at Leah, "Yeah you have. You're giving us everything."_

"_Well, sweet as this is, I need to push. Like now."_

_We've gone over this a hundred times, you take her hand, and brush the hair away from her face. I have her other hand, and am concentrating on the medical side of things, watching the midwives and doctors at work. Twins are tricky, and Leah is exhausted._

_You are amazing, I watch you with her, talking to her, encouraging her through every contraction. You are so nervous, I can see it, I know all your tells. But no one else does. And to them you are confident, and concentrating solely on being a rock for Leah._

_They don't know that you have spent the last month talking through your fears about this with me. You are scared something will go wrong in the birth, you are scared Leah will change her mind, you are scared you will be a bad parent, you are terrified you will do something wrong and the kids will hate you._

_I couldn't ever make you guarantees, but I knew you would be an amazing parent. And as I watched you with Leah, it was confirmed. You put aside everything you were feeling to help her, and that is everything you needed to be._

_Leah is incredible. I have seen women in labor before, through my training, and every time I am astonished at how much they find to give, when their bodies seem to be utterly spent._

_Twin One arrives, on the small side, but crying and pink. And a boy. I glance up at you and smile as he is taken off to be wrapped up warm. One to go._

_Leah is emotional now, and has to do it all again. You bend down to whisper something in her ear and she smiles at you. I grab your other hand with mine, and squeeze it. Leah laughs "Kiss. Give me something to smile about."_

_I wasn't going to say no._

_Another contraction hits Leah and she is back to pushing. Twin Two arrives nine minutes after Twin One. A girl. She is smaller than her brother, but not dangerously so. They were born almost a month before they were due so it isn't a surprise. Like her brother, she cries almost immediately, and I can almost see the tension leave your body. _

_They are taken straight to special care, as they are still slightly premature so need to be checked over. We sit with Leah as the birth completes, not wanting her to be alone, even though it feels like there is something in my chest pulling me to the babies._

"_Thank you for being here for me. You guys are going to be the best parents to those kids, I know it." She starts crying, completely overwhelmed._

_Another one of your fears gone, you hug Leah again. I can hear you comforting her, as I grab her a drink._

"_If you want to make this an open adoption, we still don't mind. We would love for you to still be in contact."_

_She shakes her head, "I can't think clearly right now. But I think closed is for the best. I will let you know through the agency I guess."_

_You nod, you have tears running down your face, the emotion of the day finally catching up with you. _

"_Do you guys have names picked?"_

_We had a couple, but we want to make sure Leah didn't want any names specifically first. She shook her head as you asked, though._

"_I didn't find out the gender so that I didn't start thinking of names. They're not mine to name. I'm ok now guys, I need to rest anyway. I was up all night with contractions. You go find your babies. Give them a cuddle from me, yeah?"_

"_We will. We can't thank you enough, Leah, honestly. You've given us the best gift in the world. Whether you keep the adoption closed or not, the kids will know their mom was one of the most generous, kind-hearted, amazing people we have ever met." I can feel tears on my cheeks now, my voice was cracking as I spoke to Leah. I could never have enough words to thank her. Ever._

_We give her one last cuddle each, before we walk down to special care to meet our babies. They are fine, and we will be allowed to take them home that evening if they continue on well._

_After we feed them, they are moved to the nursery. Their name tags still say Twin One and Twin Two, we are waiting for our family to meet them before we announce their names._

_I wrap my arms around you from behind as we watch the babies sleep. Everyone finds us like that, I'm sure we haven't moved in the last 20 minutes._

_All the women cry as they see us and then the babies. I'm sure I see Jasper wipe away a tear as he pulls you into a hug, too._

"_Do they have names yet?" My mum is dabbing at her eyes with a tissue._

_I nod to you, letting you make the announcement. "The girl is called Isabella Leah Masen - Cullen. And the boy is Benjamin Anthony Masen - Cullen." You pause, swallowing down an emotion. "Anthony was my dad's name."_

_My mum leaves my side immediately to hug you, and Rose and Alice congratulate us on good choices._

_Emmett is pressed against the glass like a kid at the zoo, and is suspiciously quiet._

"_You ok, Em?"_

_His eyes are a little red as he rubs at them and turns to face me. A grin appears on his face and he shakes his head at me. "I can't believe I moved my wedding for you – I could be having wedding day sex right now, Carlisle – and you couldn't even name one of these guys after me."_

* * *

_**FIN.**  
_

_**Thank you guys so much for all the support. This was my first ever fanfic and to get all the notifications was amazing. Thank you especially to everyone who reviewed. I love you all. I try to reply to every one, so if you didn't ever get a reply it was because your PMs were off.  
**_

_**I have no plans for outtakes/futuretakes, I think everything was covered in here. But if there is something you really want to hear about, feel free to let me know and I will see what I can do.  
**_

_**I have outlined another Carlward fic which I hope to start posting within the next month or so.  
**_

_**Thank you all for reading :)  
**_


	11. Christmas Future-take

**Hello! Thank you all for the wonderful response to this story. **

**I know I said there wasn't much more I needed to write, but I couldn't quite resist. **

**Here's a future-take of Isabella and Benjamin's second Christmas.**

**Thanks to Karen EC for pre-reading for me.**

* * *

_You turn to me, your eyes gleaming with the reflection of the Christmas lights._

"_Do you think they'll like it?"_

"_They'll love it. They're one-year olds and it has lights and dangly bits. I give them a minute before they're trying to take everything off it."_

* * *

Our first year as parents had flown by.

You were such a natural dad, even though at times you weren't confident in your own abilities. I can understand that, though. I was completely embarrassed when I rushed Benjamin into Urgent Care one night – thinking he was suffering from pneumonia or something along those lines – only to be told by one of my own interns that it was just a cold.

We didn't tend to bring up each others' shortcomings, though. I think we both vividly remembered the night we brought the twins home.

They had stayed in hospital for a couple of nights, just to be sure that they were strong enough to be out in the wintery weather. The car journey home was a long one, and we stopped every hour or so to feed and change one twin or the other.

When we finally got home, I insisted to my mum and dad that we didn't need help. They had already booked a hotel for a few nights anyway, fed up of the two of us deserting them to go to work. We eventually managed to shoo everyone out of the door. Well, once they had helped us move the stuff out of the car anyway; we had somehow acquired a mountain during the trip.

Surrounded by piles of stuff we probably didn't need, and two babies who we most definitely did need, I pulled you into my arms.

"This is it, baby. We're home with them."

You glanced down at Benjamin and Isabella, sleeping in their car seats. We were both too scared of waking them up to even think about trying to move them into their Moses baskets.

"What do we do now?" Your eyes darted around the room, obviously taking in all of the things that needed doing. My mum and dad had stayed before we left for the wedding, so we needed to sort out the guest room. We should really have unpacked and started some washing going. The house was in disarray thanks to us working all the hours we could before the babies were born, so we should have tidied up a little.

Instead, I moved us to the sofa, lying back with you and enjoying the peace.

"We relax. I'm sure we're going to be up most of the night with the babies, so we don't do anything right now except chill out."

"I can't believe we're parents, Carlisle. What if we're terrible at it?"

I would have laughed, but I knew it was a very real fear of yours, so instead, I squeezed your bicep reassuringly. "We won't be terrible, baby. You had a good childhood, I had a good childhood, and we both really wanted these kids."

You nodded into my shoulder, and I dipped down to kiss the top of your head.

"Edward, you love those babies already; I could see it in you the minute they were born, and every minute since. You hardly left the hospital unless we forced you to go and eat something."

"You're one to talk," you mumbled into my shoulder.

"Well, that's all the better then, isn't it? We both care about them more than eating. Although, as a doctor, I should probably suggest that we figure out the eating thing pretty quickly."

"I think your mom is going to sort our eating out."

That was true. My mum had already booked our kitchen for the next day, insisting on making us batches of freezable meals, so that we wouldn't starve. My dad was the poor sucker who was roped into taking her around the grocery store to stock up; I can't imagine that particular job was much fun given that Christmas was almost upon us.

I'd always heard stories of new parents being awake half the night, just to check that their baby is still breathing. There was none of that for us. On the rare occasion that both babies were quiet, we were both asleep too. We didn't get more than half an hour at a time, thanks to the amount of time it took us to make the bottles up, feed the baby and burp them, and then get them back down. By the time we'd done all that, the other one was squawking.

When my mum arrived the next day, I opened the door bleary-eyed and with a baby in my arms. She patted me on the head, took the squealing Isabella from me, and told me to go back to bed.

I tried to protest, but she was having none of it. "I've had babies, Carlisle. I know how to multi-task."

"Don't put my baby in the oven by mistake," I warned her.

"You've got a spare," she winked at me. "We will be fine. Your father can hold the baby when I'm doing anything I need both hands for." She told my dad to go and get Benjamin from upstairs so that we could sleep without interruption, and sent me back to bed.

It was heaven.

You stirred as I crawled under the covers, and I mumbled what was going on.

"Thank God. I'm so tired."

I wrapped my arms around you, and we both fell asleep for a solid four hours, feeling much more refreshed when we woke up.

You showered quickly, and by the time I came downstairs, my mum had you in her arms.

"You just need to figure out the balance, Edward. You've had a crazy few days; you're bound to be tired. Sleep when they sleep, even if it's daytime. Order a few takeaways instead of making yourself cook, leave washing up for the next morning, don't vacuum every day – the world won't end."

She saw me come into the room, and nodded to me.

"You two have got your heads screwed on properly. You'll figure it out. I'm around for a few weeks, so I can help out."

My mum was an absolute Godsend. We thought we were prepared, but life with two tiny babies was something we could never have been ready for.

Benjamin and Isabella's first Christmas passed in a blur; we hardly even noticed it happen. My mum cooked us a lovely lunch, and there are photos of us opening presents and looking suitably festive – but I'm fairly sure neither of us can remember any of it.

~-FOF-~

I woke up one night after New Year to find you sitting up in bed next to me, Isabella in your arms, an empty bottle on the nightstand, and tears in your eyes.

"What's up, baby?" I sat up and pulled you into my arms as best I could.

"This is difficult, Carlisle. Really difficult. More difficult than I ever imagined."

Pressing a kiss to your head, I moved Isabella back into her Moses basket before slipping back into bed. I wrapped my arms around you, and tried as best I could to comfort you.

"We're doing okay, though. I know we're tired, and it feels like the kids are always awake, but I bet all parents feel like that."

You didn't reply, content to rest your head on my shoulder, your hand teasing over my chest.

"Benjamin and Isabella are content, and well fed, and completely loved. That's what they need right now. I know we're putting all this effort in, and it's like we're getting nothing back, but we are. They are growing; they are getting to know us. You know sometimes they stop crying when we pick them up and talk to them? That means they know it's us, and they know they're safe with us. That's huge, baby. It's not like we were around every day before they were born, so they didn't get to know us that way."

While that was strictly true, I knew that Leah played any voicemails we left her on speakerphone, so that the babies would hear our voices and get used to them. We also met up with her a few times in the last few weeks of her pregnancy, so they did have some exposure.

I'm fairly sure you were too tired to be bothered to come up with any of those arguments, though. I made sure to do the rest of the feeds that night. I was far more used to being awake for long periods of time than you were, and it was important for your mental health that you got some sleep.

As we stumbled our way into February, we said goodbye to my mum and dad. My parents had been looking for somewhere to live over here, but it was not as simple to move as we would have liked, sadly.

Fortunately, by the time my parents left, the babies were in a slightly better routine. They tended to wake up at the same time, which was a pain in the ass if one of us was working the next day – we were back to working a few odd shifts – but it meant we had more unbroken sleep in between, which was very much needed.

They were also only –generally – waking up once during the night, if we discarded the fact that they thought six o'clock in the morning was an acceptable time to start the day. We tended to both get up with them in the middle of the night, taking a kid each, and sharing the load of sorting them out. When it came to getting up for the day, it depended on our work schedules. We figured it out, though, and finally we were feeling a little more human now we had more sleep every night.

Time hurtled on, and before we knew it, the babies were, thankfully, fully sleeping through the night. We started picking up more shifts at work, while trying desperately to avoid putting them into day-care. Emmett and Rosalie were back from honeymoon, and were always willing to help us out if we needed babysitters – I was slightly concerned at what my younger brother might be teaching them, though. Jasper and Alice were always happy to help, too.

We had some great support around us, and it made those first few months a lot easier.

The first time I was on nights was an experience. For some reason, the idea of being alone with the babies at night was a lot scarier to you than being alone with them during the day. You spent most of that night awake, and sending me text messages.

Things with the kids were quiet the next day.

They were changing seemingly every day. It was amazing to see their personalities coming through. Isabella was demanding and vocal, wanting constant attention, while Benjamin was a lot more laid back, and happy to play on his own. Both of them were incredible, and we had absolutely mountains of photos of them to put into their scrapbooks.

You were an amazing dad. Whenever I came back from work, you'd tell me all the things that you'd been up to with the kids. You took them out to the park every day, so happy that we were close-by. On the days you worked, I would generally have a lazy morning with them. I found being out with them all day quite a challenge – unlike you – and so when it was just the three of us, we tended to head out for a only couple of hours at a time. Sometimes we would come and meet you at the store, showing the babies off to your work colleagues and giving you a chance to see you kids. I knew you missed them a lot when you were at work.

We managed to take them to our cabin over your birthday. They charmed the lady who worked in the coffee shop we often visited. It was the first time I'd seen her focus that much on anyone but you.

Isabella was crawling by then. Benjamin wasn't even interested in trying. We took them to our picnic spot one lunchtime. It was a nightmare trying to cart all the stuff we needed with us, along with the two babies, but it was well worth it. We let Isabella explore the area around us as we ate, while Benjamin lay on his back on the picnic blanket, giggling every time he could get a fistful of food.

"Are you glad we did this?" I asked you.

"Came on vacation?"

"No, had the twins."

You looked at me, surprised. "Yes, of course I am. I love them, and I love you. It's perfect. Why, aren't you?"

"I am, I am," I rushed to reassure you. "It's just... being here made me think. We could do whatever we liked a year ago; it's so different now. But I wouldn't change it for the world."

Isabella was tired, and had moved to rest on my chest, and you grabbed a sleepy Benjamin off the blanket and cuddled him to you. "I think we're pretty damn lucky, Carlisle. I've got you, and these guys. So we can't be as spontaneous as we used to be, and maybe you aren't able to be naked as much as I'd like any more. But we do okay. The balance is working alright, isn't it?"

"Yeah, it is. I just wanted to check in with you. I know we don't always talk about much apart from the kids sometimes." I made sure Isabella was secure on my chest, and managed to free an arm to stroke your cheek. "I love you, Edward."

"I love you, too, Carlisle."

I leaned in for a kiss, and the movement caused Isabella to start whinging.

"Were we ignoring you while you were asleep, beautiful girl?" I asked her, and she settled down again immediately. Always wanting to be centre of attention, bless her.

"I'll reclaim that kiss later, it is my birthday, after all," you smiled shyly at me.

You cashed in the kiss and more, when we went to bed, and once again I found myself eternally grateful to both of our children for having turned into such sound sleepers.

* * *

_Emmett bursts through the front door, carrying Isabella in his arms. He looks around before realising that Isabella is stretching out to reach you, and hands her over._

"_I thought you guys were putting the decorations up? Where are they all?"_

_We look at the cards, tinsel and lights that we have put up around the place, and the – frankly ridiculously big – Christmas tree in the corner._

"_We have decorated, Em. What are you talking about?"_

"_There's not a lot going on here."_

"_Just because you like it to look like the Christmas fairy has vomited all over the place, Emmett," Rosalie chastises him, handing Benjamin to me. "It looks lovely, guys."_

"_Thanks, Rose. And Em, don't even think about making a comment about fairies, or I'll punch you. Edward can cover the kids' eyes."_

_Emmett grins, but remains quiet._

_You offer Emmett and Rosalie a drink, and we sit in the lounge, watching the kids look at the lights. Isabella isn't overly interested; she has recently started walking, and so she is busy drinking in Rosalie's admiration for that, walking between her Uncle and Aunt. On the other hand, Benjamin – who has already been walking for a couple of weeks, having skipped the crawling phase completely – is utterly enthralled. He is pointing at every single light he sees, making sure that I am looking too._

_Finally, he is satisfied that I have seen all the lights, and he toddles off to inspect the tree alone. We decided to put it behind a fireguard, to stop the kids from pulling it over, and to stop them from getting to their presents. The guard has enough holes in it that they can still see the tree though, and Isabella eventually joins her brother in admiring it._

"_How were they for you?" I ask my brother._

_The twins stayed the night with Emmett and Rose. It's not the first time they have stayed out for the night, but it's still a fairly rare occurrence. Much as we like our time alone, we miss them when they're not here, and the house just doesn't feel right._

"_They were angels. Although they woke up at six o'clock this morning and wouldn't go back to sleep, even when I begged."_

"_We did warn you, Em. They do it every day." They're utter buggers for waking up early. No matter what time we put them to bed, they wake up at six in the morning. We've got used to it now, but my brother isn't a fan of being woken up at the best of times, let alone by two squawking children. _

_You come back in with drinks for everyone: hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows, and I'm fairly sure I fall in love with you a little more. Rather than sit by me, you crouch by the kids, pointing out some of the ornaments on the tree to them._

_As always, they are utterly enthralled by your words. You pick a few, non-breakable, ornaments off for them to feel, and they giggle with delight. You're so good with them; they hang on every word you say. _

_Isabella toddles over to me to show me what she has in her hand. I make suitably impressed noises, and hang it off my finger so she can bat it a bit. She giggles, and Benjamin joins us, eager to investigate anything that could make him laugh._

_You sit on the sofa next to me, dangling an ornament for Benjamin, and for a minute we are all completely lost in our family bubble. I lean over and kiss you on the lips, needing you to know how much I love you. Everything wonderful I have in my life is due to us meeting, and the fact that you took a huge leap in asking me to date you, despite being so shy._

_Our kiss lasts a little longer than is probably appropriate for company, and Emmett has no qualms in interrupting us. "There are young, innocent eyes here, you know."_

"_It's good for them to see their parents in love," Rosalie tells him._

"_I was talking about me."_

_I roll my eyes and break away from you, but throw my arm around your shoulders instead, unwilling to completely break our contact._

"_When do Mum and Dad fly in?" Emmett asks. _

_There was no way my mum was going to miss Christmas with her kids and grandchildren, so they've booked flights out. They are staying with Em and Rosalie until a couple of days after Christmas though, and then coming to us, so I don't know the exact details of their arrival. _

"_The day before Christmas Eve. Are you still okay to host Christmas here? Mum said she'll help you cook."_

"_Yeah, we'll be fine as long as we get everything prepped in time, but with Mum here I'm sure that won't be a problem. We do this for Thanksgiving too, so we're used to it, this is just a much bigger scale."_

"_And you need to entertain the kids while you cook," Emmett points out. "Mind you, they'll get you up in plenty of time to start cooking." He glares at the twins playfully, but they are far too busy emptying the contents of their toybox all over the floor to pay their Uncle any attention._

"_Yeah," I grimace. I'm not sure how we're going to deal with the kids, and cooking for everyone."I was going to see if Mum and Dad could come over early and help out. Jasper and Alice said they'd pop in, too, so maybe they can come round in the morning. What time are you getting here?"_

"_Well, if you can get Mum and Dad out of our hair so that Rosie and me can have a little alone time in the morning, we can probably get here by the time you're dishing up the food." He grins at me, and Rosalie slaps him over the head._

_He rolls his eyes, but corrects himself. "We just want some time together. We were on honeymoon last Christmas so we kinda missed doing the whole festive thing. If you can persuade Mum and Dad to get here early, then it just gives us a few hours to exchange presents and stuff. We can be here by late morning."_

"_Okay, that's fair." I do feel bad that they are giving up their first real Christmas together to host my parents for the nights and spend the days with us, but they seem to be okay with it. The least I can do, though, is get my parents out of their way for a little while. Then they might return the favour for us, sometime._

"_Great," he stands up, pulling Rose with him. "We're going to get going anyway. It's time for us to enjoy all the perks of being married and without kids."_

_I roll my eyes. "Alright, we'll see you in a few days?"_

"_Yeah, we'll see you at some point before the food's ready on Christmas Day. Hey, I hope you've bought me a good present. You're not allowed to slack off just because you have kids, you know."_

"_Goodbye, Emmett."_

_We see them out – the twins waving furiously at them, which is their new favourite trick._

"_Your brother exhausts me more than these guys do," you laugh, shifting Benjamin to your other arm. The twins are getting bigger by the day; it's not quite so easy to carry them around anymore._

"_He is a handful. I was hoping Rose would calm him down a little, but it hasn't happened yet. He might behave better when my parents are here."_

_You raise an eyebrow at me, obviously not convinced at my words, and walk back into the house out of the cold._

_You're probably right; Emmett doesn't filter what he says for anyone. Christmas could be interesting._

~-FOF-~

_Christmas Day arrives much like Emmett normally does – in a whirlwind of crazy, but in a way you can't help but love._

_The twins choose today of all days to sleep in, so we decide to spend the first part of the morning tiptoeing around, trying not to wake them. Well, that's what we would have done if we were behaving like responsible adults. In reality we spend forty-five minutes of it in bed, making sure that we both start the day off in exactly the right way._

_We manage to get in thirty minutes of work before cries from the nursery signal that Isabella has woken up, which in turn wakes Benjamin as well._

_My mum and dad arrive not long after the kids are dressed for the day, and they immediately get to work. My mum helps me in the kitchen while you and my dad try to keep the kids entertained. I know that you're still sometimes nervous around my dad – although you have no reason to be. He is quiet, and doesn't feel the need to fill silences, and it makes you worry that he doesn't want to speak to you. You seem to be getting on okay now, though. The kids give you something to talk about, or rather, something to focus on instead of any silences._

_We swap over every now and then, although my dad falls asleep mid-morning, so we all end up in the kitchen, trying to keep the kids busy and away from the oven._

"_How are you two doing, anyway?" My mum is busy feeding the kids so many snacks they're never going to eat their lunch, but I can't bring myself to stop her._

"_We're okay," you tell her, with a shy grin at me._

"_Have you figured out the balance thing yet? I can imagine it's tough with twins. It was difficult enough with my two only eighteen months apart."_

_Your face goes bright red, no doubt remembering this morning. You turn to the oven, to avoid answering._

"_Yeah, Mum. We don't get it right all the time, but it's a lot easier now the kids are older. They're more of a handful during the day, but at least we can sleep at night. That helps a lot."_

_She nods, smiling at us "I'm proud of you two, you know? You've done this pretty much on your own, and Benjamin and Isabella are turning into lovely children. I bet Leah would be happy if she met them."_

_Leah decided to make the adoption semi-open. She hasn't met the twins since they were born, but we send pictures through the adoption agency every six months. In return, we get a letter from her, telling us what she is up to. Last we heard, she is studying at college, still not entirely sure what she wants from life, but she was seemingly still satisfied that she has made the right choices._

_I'm pleased that she decided to keep some contact with us. We are more than happy for her to meet us and the kids if she ever wants to, and we always reiterate that to the adoption agency when we're in touch with them._

_She hasn't taken us up on the offer yet, and we don't want to push it. Sometimes I wish that she could be involved, though. We'd have no trouble setting an extra place for Christmas lunch._

_Finally, we reach a point when everything in the kitchen can be left, and we go to sit down in the lounge. My dad is still asleep, but Isabella is soon tugging at the leg of his trousers, unable to understand why he isn't paying her any attention._

_We pass the kids some little things to open; they're still not old enough to really get into Christmas, but we help them unwrap some balls that flash when you drop them on the floor. They don't entirely get the concept themselves, but they know that if they pass their new toys to us, we will make them work for them – which seems to be just as good._

_My mum and dad have bought them some clothes and books, which we unwrap for them – the kids aren't interested in anything except playing with the wrapping the presents came in. We let them get on with it, only interfering when they start to try and eat the paper._

_The doorbell rings, and Isabella chases you as you go to answer it. I hear her squeal with delight, and she re-enters the room upside down, carried by Jasper. He throws her gently down onto the sofa next to me, and picks Benjamin up to give him the same treatment. They absolutely love it._

_We're never that rough with them – I've seen too many horrible accidents at work to even contemplate it, and you aren't really a rough-houser either. I don't worry too much about Jasper, though, he is never anything but careful, and then kids absolutely adore him for it._

_You and Alice finally come back in, carrying armfuls of presents. Jasper and Alice are the twins' godparents, along with Em and Rose, and they never stop spoiling our children. Despite us insisting that one-year-olds really don't care about gifts, I'm fairly sure they've bought them more presents than we have._

"_You really didn't have to, guys," I tell them, as I take some of the presents from Alice and put them under the tree._

"_I didn't, it was all her," Jasper laughs. "I can follow orders."_

_Alice huffs. "There's just too much cute stuff, I can't help it. All the clothes are so tiny and sweet, but I can't just buy them clothes, so I got them some toys, too. Then I thought I should probably encourage them educationally too, so I bought them some books."_

"_I'm sure the kids will appreciate it," you offer. We all look at the twins as they rip some wrapping paper to shreds. "Well, maybe they will appreciate it more in time. I'm sure they'll be pleased they look stylish in all their photos when we look back at them."_

_I press a kiss to your head; you're still the sweet boy I met all those years ago, never wanting anyone to feel like they aren't valued._

_My mum heads back out to the kitchen, dragging my dad with her to help. I stand up to go too, but she insists that I stay. "You spend some time with your friends. It's Christmas, relax; we've got this."_

_I feel bad that my mum is ending up doing all the work, but she claims that watching the kids is a job in itself, ignoring the fact that there are three other adults in the room to share that job with me. It is quite nice to relax, though. Jasper and Alice are happy to play with the kids for a while, and they help them open a few of their presents while they have the twins' attention._

_We all end up sitting on the floor, surrounded by presents and wrapping paper. Benjamin and Isabella are in their element. _

"_What have you two got planned for the rest of day, then?" I ask our guests. We invited them to eat with us – the more the merrier – but they declined, having already sorted out their day a while ago._

"_We're eating at my parent's house," Alice tells me, as Jasper pulls a face. I know he's not a huge fan of Alice's parents, and I'm fairly sure the feeling is mutual. They're still not convinced that owning two music stores is a valid career and badger him repeatedly to get a 'proper' job._

"_I'm not sure Benjamin is going to let me leave," Jasper grins. Our son has his hands in Jasper's hair, forever fascinated by it. He spends most of his time with people with short hair – apart from Rose, who sensibly keeps hers tied back whenever our grabby kids are around – so Jasper's hair is an endless source of fun for him. Jasper's hair isn't overly long, but it's enough to get a good fistful of, which is what Benjamin is currently doing. Jasper lets him get on with it, completely calm about having his hair pulled by a one-year-old._

"_He can just come with us; you're not getting out of it, Jasper." _

_Jasper looks to you for help, but you just laugh. "I'm not getting involved in this. I'm not a therapist."_

_I don't blame you._

_It's soon time for them to head off, and we haven't even made it halfway through the pile of presents they have bought. Alice shrugs it off, deciding that it is all the more reason for them to come back and visit tomorrow, which is fine by us. We see them off at the door, the twins grinning and waving as usual._

_I wrap my free arm around you before putting a squirming Isabella down, and pull you into a proper hug. Well, as proper as it can be with Benjamin between us. He is sweet though; he rests an arm on each of our shoulders and tries to join in. _

_Sometimes I can't believe how lucky I am to have all of this. Our kids run us off our feet, and there are days when I wish for a quiet life, but I wouldn't really give this up for anything. You're an amazing husband and father, and I couldn't wish for more._

_We relieve my mum and dad in the kitchen, letting them spend some time with their grandchildren before Emmett and Rosalie get here. I hope they get through a few more presents while they're in there. The pile under the tree is reaching ridiculous levels now – not that I'm ungrateful, but the kids don't have a clue that it's Christmas. Add that into the fact it was their birthday a couple of weeks ago, and we're going to need a bigger house for all their stuff soon._

_We've got preparing the Christmas meal down now, after all these years together. We work seamlessly around each other, and before we know it, it's almost ready to serve._

_I call Emmett to see where they are, because they're dangerously close to missing out on the food completely. As the phone is ringing, though, there is a banging at the door. No need to guess who that is._

_Once Emmett and Rosalie have come in and made the pile of presents even higher, we finally sit down to eat._

_The entire meal is a bit manic. Benjamin and Isabella have been snacking all morning, and aren't too pleased at the idea that they now have to sit in their high chairs and eat a meal. We manage to keep them there for most of the main course, but by the time we reach dessert we each have a child on our lap. _

"_This meal's really nice guys, thanks," Emmett tells us through a mouthful of food._

"_It probably tastes even better because you managed to avoid all of the preparation for it, Emmett," my mum grins at him, not really annoyed._

"_Every meal tastes better when you don't have to cook it, Mum. It's one of Einstein's theories, I'm sure, that's why I avoid cooking so often."_

"_You're on washing up duty, Em," I tell him. "That's one of Newton's laws."_

"_How is that a fucking law?"_

"_Language Emmett." That was my mum. We both pay her no attention._

"_For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. You didn't prepare the food, so you can clear up."_

"_You're a fucking nerd, C."_

"_Emmett!" My mum, again._

"_What? He just busted out high school physics to make me do the washing up. He's a nerd."_

"_You mentioned Einstein first, you moron." I'm thirty-five years old and arguing with my little brother like we're teenagers. I can't stop, though._

_You turn to my mum. "Are Benjamin and Isabella going to be like this when they can talk?"_

"_Oh yes. You learn to tune it out until someone starts screaming in pain, though. It's a parent thing, I think."_

_We send Emmett off to do the washing up, neglecting to mention that we do have a dishwasher. He should know that by now, he's been here enough times. My mum gets up to help, but we all refuse to let her, insisting that she relaxes for a while. _

_The twins are tired, so we decide to put them down for a nap in the nursery. Hopefully Emmett's voice won't travel all the way up the stairs and disturb them. They go down surprisingly easily considering that there is so much going on today._

_We stay in the room with them until they drop off, pleased to have a moment of calm in the day._

"_Do you really think they're going to fight like you and Emmett?" you whisper to me, as we sit on the loveseat._

_I laugh softly. "Yeah, probably. Maybe even worse; at least I had time away from Em at school."_

"_I don't want them to argue. I want them to love each other."_

_I sometimes forget that you are an only child. Sibling relationships are probably difficult to understand from the outside._

"_Don't worry, baby, they will. I love Emmett, even if he annoys the crap out of me most of the time. He's my baby brother, and I'd do anything for him."_

"_I hope they're like that when they're older."_

"_They will be, I'm sure of it." I pull you as close to me as possible, knowing you need the reassurance of being close to me, as well as my words right now._

"_How do you know?"_

"_How can they not be? They've got us as role models."_

"_You and Emmett?"_

"_No, baby, you and me. How much do you love me and the babies?"_

"_So much. You know that. I can't even put it into words."_

"_It's the same for me. So they're surrounded by all this love, there's no way they won't be affected by that. They're going to love each other, and us. Please don't worry about it."_

"_Okay." You burrow down into my chest a little more. "Can we hide out up here until the twins wake up?"_

"_You want to sit in a room where we have to whisper for an hour and a half?"_

"_No, I want to get you naked," you grin. "__A__ll this talk of how much we love each other makes me want to prove it."_

_I laugh. "You can prove it later, baby. Right now, though, we have a whole mountain of presents to open, and my family to entertain."_

_We stand up, checking on the kids before we head downstairs._

_As we get to the bottom of the stairs, you grab both my hands with yours, and pull me to you for a gentle kiss._

"_I love you, Carlisle."_

"_I love you too, Edward."_

_Emmett chooses that moment to walk past us, groaning at our display, despite how innocent it is._

"_Hey, Einstein, riddle me this. If I spew up on the floor, does that mean you guys have to clean it up? My action, your reaction?"_

_Shaking my head, I follow Emmett into the lounge, knowing that this was just the beginning of what could be a very long afternoon._

_I wouldn't change it for the world, though._


End file.
